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Post by Don Quixote on Apr 5, 2012 22:36:33 GMT -5
Mom... Dad... I have a confession.
I've held it in for way too long, and I know you had high hopes for me. I know what you wanted for my future. But I can't keep this inside me any more. I... I... I'm a Belarian.
I know, I know. It's a sin. I'm going to go to hell. I'll never be accepted. But I can't change how I feel. I've tried to be an obese space captain with a cotton ball beard or a gruff commander with a Susan Powder haircut, but I just can't.
I know in my heart I'm a Belarian. If you can't accept that then that's your problem, not mine. I still love you guys, no matter what you think of me.
Now, I have to go. I need to put on a gauzy toga and dance around one of those plasma light-up balls from Spencer's now.
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Post by Mitchell on Apr 6, 2012 11:13:44 GMT -5
Jenkem. America's silent tragedy.
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Post by Don Quixote on Apr 6, 2012 19:28:36 GMT -5
It's only a matter of time before Dick Hafer does an expose comic about the "Disgusting, sinful Belarian lifestyle."
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Post by Crowfan on Apr 7, 2012 15:11:36 GMT -5
You know, you could just get yourself a girlfriend.
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Post by Mitchell on Apr 7, 2012 21:13:51 GMT -5
That has been a very sensitive subject ever since she became deflated.
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Post by Ratso on Apr 8, 2012 4:16:33 GMT -5
That has been a very sensitive subject ever since she became deflated. That never stopped my love life. I CAN PLEASE RUBBER BETTER THAN ANY MAN!
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Post by Mitchell on Apr 8, 2012 7:49:39 GMT -5
That's nice. I heard Rubber was getting 3-1 in the fifth.
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Post by Crowfan on Apr 8, 2012 19:52:27 GMT -5
That has been a very sensitive subject ever since she became deflated. That never stopped my love life. I CAN PLEASE RUBBER BETTER THAN ANY MAN! I read this wrong.
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Post by Don Quixote on Apr 8, 2012 21:37:04 GMT -5
That has been a very sensitive subject ever since she became deflated. My doddering, slightly addled father poked her with a fork in his mansion. And then later, I showed up with Kess from Voyager! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK!
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Post by mummifiedstalin on Apr 12, 2012 7:52:43 GMT -5
I do not like poached gall and spam. I do not like them, Spank-My-Hams! I will not eat them with my throat. I will not eat them through your moat. I will not eat them near your box. I will not eat them with old lox. I will not with toe jam. I will not eat them rubbed on ham. I will not eat them here or there. I will not eat them anywhere.
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Post by Mitchell on Apr 12, 2012 14:30:43 GMT -5
Just shut up and eat the motherf+++CARRIER LOST+++
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Post by Don Quixote on Apr 12, 2012 21:54:13 GMT -5
This thread is just like the Thanksgiving phone call I'm allowed with my family.
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Post by siamesesin on Apr 13, 2012 1:33:43 GMT -5
Completed whilst being assaulted in the shower?
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Post by Mitchell on Apr 13, 2012 8:42:07 GMT -5
It's more role-play
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Post by The Deceased on Apr 13, 2012 19:33:59 GMT -5
More like verbatim movie reenactments.
"Squeal like a pig, boy"
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