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Post by Mike Flugennock on Aug 6, 2014 10:25:56 GMT -5
Why not: 1. Cave Dwellers 2. Monster A Go Go 3. Laserblast 4. Gamera vs. Guiron 5. Outlaw 6. Puma Man 7. Pod People 8. Space Mutiny 9. Time of the Apes 10. The Day the Earth Froze 7. Pod PeopleY'know, for the longest time, Pod People was really hard to watch for me because the ending always depressed the hell out of me, and I pretty much avoided it. Still, a few weeks ago, I decided to give it another shot and, miraculously, not only did the ending not depress me, but I actually dug the hell out of the whole episode. I first saw MST3K in mid 1990 -- I dimly remember Joel with a soul patch, sometime in Season 2 -- but Pod People was the earliest episode I had any clear memory of, mostly for that host segment with the Wall O'Keyboards where Joel demonstrates how New Age music is written. 10. The Day The Earth FrozeI'm so glad I finally developed a love for the Russo-Finnish stuff. Those were really rough going for me for a long time -- the glacial plot pacing always beat me down -- so I never watched them much. About six months or so ago, though, I finally got up the nerve to take another crack at The Sword And The Dragon and, surprisingly, I totally loved it. This was probably due to the fact that things happen very quickly, very early in the movie, unlike most of the Russo-Finnish epics. Happily, my enjoyment of The Sword And The Dragon gave me the courage to take another whack at Magic Voyage Of Sinbad and The Day The Earth Froze, which both finally found solid spots in my regular rotation -- especially The Day The Earth Froze, which also has some of the densest riffing of any episode -- and the funniest -- as well as some really rockin' host segments.
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Post by RedTom on Aug 31, 2014 21:41:18 GMT -5
1. Werewolf The funniest, dumbest movie MST3K has ever riffed! I love how they strike at every single horrible detail that is bad about this movie! The movie makes absolutely no sense what-so-ever but somehow it got itself on video. Favorite Riff: "I'll kill you whole family if you call me a psycho again!!" Favorite Skit: Tom turns into a Were-Mike!
2. Deadly Bees A nameless British mystery that was extremely easy to figure out. The plot didn't make sense and the characters were stupid and grungy. But the bees are hilarious! Mike and the Bots do great riffs on the old woman and the depressing man. Favorite Riff: "We blame you Hargrove." Favorite Skit: Pet lice and wood ticks!
3. Red Zone Cuba The worst directed movie by the worst director ever! Their stupidity and aimless droning is perfect material for their jokes! Without MST3K this movie would be absolutely impossible to watch, but with their commentary it can be watched over and over again. Favorite Riff: "Water, Thirsty, Sick man!" Favorite Skit: The Lotto!
4. Master Ninja I Oh, where to begin? This episode is watchable just for the first segment, and how nutty and stupid both Lees' characters are! The fake ninja and the high school-crack head go places and piss random people off. Oh and twenty minutes of training obviously merits the High School drop out to go kissing all of the girls he comes in contact with but then ends up spaz chopping the bad guy and somehow winning. Favorite Riff: "My Tooth Brush" "Which could rip a man's teeth out." Favorite Skit: The ninja theme song battle
6. Final Justice Beefy, Chunky justice in its best! Their non-stop fat jokes surprisingly never got old on this one! I couldn't believe how badly this movie was made, and how well they caught onto every single good riff that hit the nail right on the head! I loved all of the Maltese Male jokes, probably most of all. Favorite Riff: "Watch my back" "Watch it jiggle as I move!!" Favorite Skit: Mike's falling!
7. Track of the Moon Beast This aimless, nameless Paul was a terribly pulled off monster. The best part was probably the Johnny Longbone riffs, as well as the dumb bimbo blonde jokes. But of course we can never forget "California Laaaady!" Favorite Riff: "I'm boring and my slide show eats!" Favorite Skit: Lets Batter and deep fry it!
8. Cave Dwellers Another horribly thought up super hero of the middle... prehistoric... Anglo Saxon age? The best riffs of course come from the dumb henchmen and gay looking villain. But then there are harder to listen to places, like the speeches of the "Great One." Favorite Riff: "It's speedy delivery guy, and has he got a package!" Favorite Skit: TV review of the movie
9. Riding with Death An incoherent hero anyway you put it. This guy apparently does random government work that none of the other agents want to do, and somehow he succeeds where incompetent agents fail. Then there's this woman that happens to be.... places. The riffs are perfect to show the terrible villains and "good guys" of this terribly made "MOVIE." Favorite Riff: "You've got mail-AAHH!!!" Favorite Skit: Tom's a trucker
10. Jack Frost The first foreign movie I saw MST3K do, my mother hated it but I loved it to death! The stupid dubbing and the dumb looking costumes just goes perfectly with MST3K! I especially love the scenes with the stepmother and the ugly-ass stepsister. The witch, of course, tops off everything very nicely because of her wondrous dances and... interesting songs. Favorite Riff: "They're swimming in my chili! The little creeps!" Favorite Skit: Michael Nelson is lord of the dance
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Post by joobilee on Sept 1, 2014 0:39:41 GMT -5
9. Riding with Death An incoherent hero anyway you put it. This guy apparently does random government work that none of the other agents want to do, and somehow he succeeds where incompetent agents fail. Then there's this woman that happens to be.... places. The riffs are perfect to show the terrible villains and "good guys" of this terribly made "MOVIE." Favorite Riff: "You've got mail-AAHH!!!" Favorite Skit: Tom's a trucker this is silly but my favorite part of Riding with Death is when the score suddenly picks up for no good reason JfjfjssfsjFjdf
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Post by zombiewhacker on Sept 1, 2014 2:22:59 GMT -5
In my case:
Santa Claus Conquers The Martians The first MST3K I ever watched beginning to end, and the ep that made me a fan.
"Manos" The Hands Of Fate The second MST3K I ever watched beginning to end, and the ep that made me a fanatic.
The Brain That Wouldn't Die Since my first exposure was to Joel, I was initially skeptical of Mike. This and the episode to follow turned me around on that score real quick.
Wild Wild World Of Batwoman Cheating is bad. Richard Basehart is good. And this episode is great.
Werewolf Absolutely fussinating. Terrific Mike and the bots song too, one of their all-time best.
Overdrawn At The Memory Bank Mary Jo might have picked this as her least favorite movie, but it's a top ten favorite ep of mine.
Bloodlust Thanks to the "Most Dangerous Game" inspired plot, this is one of the few MST3K movies I can actually get into. And the riffing is dead-on from beginning to end.
Village Of The Giants Gratuitous jiggle throughout and great Jack Nietzche music only add to the fun.
The Unearthly I'm still trying to figure out how a tough guy actor could possibly have been named Myron, but that objection aside...
Deathstalker and The Warriors from Hell Come on, Roger, get with the program and give Shout! the DVD rights to this program.
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Post by afriendlychicken on Sept 1, 2014 3:55:18 GMT -5
My number one will always be The Magic Voyage of Sinbad since my cousin aprettyfriendlychicken gets mentioned by Crow. I know I did a top 5 or 10 somewhere else on the board a while back but the heck if I can remember what I put back then. At this moment my top 10 would be: The Magic Voyage of SinbadWait, I just remembered where I wrote my notes to figure out what my list would be...aha...I think I'll change a couple. The rest in no particular order: Godzilla vs MegalonThe Painted HillsThe Day the Earth FrozeTrack of the MoonbeastThe Beginning of the EndSpace MutinyManos: The Hands of FateGamera vs GuironThe Beast of Yucca FlatsIt was hard not putting the two Santa Claus movies since Christmas wouldn't be the same without them. Every year I switch up which one I watch first. Let's just put them as honorable mention.
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Post by RedTom on Sept 2, 2014 2:27:56 GMT -5
Well I know this is only a top 10, buuuuuut...
11. Overdrawn at the Memory Bank Finnnnnnnnngal you are mine!!!! This is a very shocking movie indeed. To see Raul Julia in such a terrible film is beyond anything I could have imagined. And he didn't look all that young in this flick, he must have been desperate for work. Oh well, both of the Adams Family movies more than make up for this terrible fluke. I could not hold my laughter during the parts with the fat man jokes, they were too damn good! Oh but no one can forget "My nuts!" Favorite Riff: "To Wendy's!" Favorite Skit: Mike Dopples Tom's Fingal
12. Puma Man Could there be a worse excuse for a super hero? No, I doubt there can be. I understand having flaws in a super hero, and some super heroes can pull it off. But this super hero just got really really lucky and wussed his way out of a lot of the real fights, leaving it up to others to solve his really tough problems. The riffs in this one are seriously ground-breakingly funny, mostly because of how well they went with the stupidity of the film perfectly. Oh and they let Mr. Evil Cue Ball Donald have it, big time, and with much laughter. Favorite Riff: "We must find him, and kill him." "Or send him a cease and desist letter." Favorite Skit: I know it was very vague and small in the scene; Tom's calling out to the head that they had created. He did the greatest impression of Donald's stupidity!
13. The Sword and the Dragon A hilarious episode!! The movie actually wasn't that terrible of a movie, but that still does not take away from the greatness in the MST3K performance. The dubs and scripts were terrible enough to give them plenty to riff on and the stupid idiotic villain was perfect material! Favorite Riff: "These pants have awoken something deep inside me!" Favorite Skit: Gypsy's song
14. Beast of Yucca Flats Coleman Francis strikes! And this time his strike is terrible, perhaps just as terrible as his gasser, Red Zone Cuba. Once again, our boys are given so much material to work with, it's amazing they didn't blow a gasket. Though the children's dialog was quite hard to sit through, the Tor jokes had me completely rolling, as was the fake dialog and HORRIBLE narration. I swear, this movie had problems on a completely different level. Favorite Riff: "Been desert horse no name duh duh duh" Favorite Skit: Frank I'm going to slap you now, and I may never stop
15. Space Mutiny Ah, good old Reb Brown and his horrible shrieks of terror. This movie has a special breed of villains and heroes in it, both stupid and completely pathetic at the same time! I could not handle myself on the Santa Clause jokes, as well as the old lady jokes for our... middle-aged heart throb. Favorite Riff: "I've got your mother!" Favorite Skit: Crow and Tom's space battle and Mike's Tea Party!
16. Final Sacrifice A town with no ones and nobodies along with their friendly neighborhood, faceless cult that comes to revive some stupid ritual. Perhaps one of the worst adventure movies ever made, mostly because the legend was so terribly thought up and executed. My favorite riffs had to be the ones about the wuss kid and "Rowsdower" Favorite Riff: "Oh he exploded before they could shoot him." Favorite Skit: Tom and Crow start a "cult"
17. Time Chasers A movie that makes no sense and does not properly follow any time-continuum. The hero is seriously out of his league, but for some reason he is able to avoid being shot or beaten to death by any of the thugs of Evil Co. JK Robertson has a lot of the great riffs, however Nick and Pink Boy were perhaps my favorite on the show. This one is seriously good! Favorite Riff: "And oil spills are a memory." "A good memory." Favorite Skit: Crow's first encounter with 80's Mike!
18. The incredible Melting Man One horribly pulled off horror/monster movie. It lacks in substance, characters, story, development and acting! Usually when people die on a space ship, it can't get back to Earth, so there shouldn't really have been a melting guy in the first place. I think their riffs on the main character's stupidity was probably my favorite part, along with the Citrus-loving old people. Favorite Riff: "He's on roller skates!" Favorite Skit: Dr. Forrestor's Surveying the audience.
19. Prince of Space Even without the crappy dubbing, this movie is still pretty damn bad! Along with the dubbing it makes for a perfectly good MST3K! The riffs on the Phantom and the kids had to be the biggest laugh-riots in this episode by far! At the end of the movie, the riffs on the old scientist guys were even better. Though there are places in this movie that suck a little too bad, it's still enjoyable! Favorite Riff: "After that dog!" Favorite Skit: Mike is a Puppet!
20. Girl in Gold Boots We keep asking our selves why we're following this girl around in the first place, and then the movie trails off into a police department robbery! The music in this movie completely sucks and really gets annoying after a while, but at least the riffs kicked major ass. This one has Critter and Icky Elf that really do great jobs in giving good jokes! Favorite Riff: "Cause I excrete oil?!" Favorite Skit: MADNESS!
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Post by crawlinghand on Sept 2, 2014 23:26:04 GMT -5
Oh man, there is at least another 2 dozen episodes I could put up here.
1. I Accuse My Parents 3. Prince of Space 4. Hobgoblins 5. Boggy Creek II 6. Robot Monster 7. Ring of Terror 8. Cave Dwellers 9. Monster A Go-Go 10. The Skydivers
Maybe I'll post more detail on why I like these ten the best.
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Post by RedTom on Sept 4, 2014 1:43:44 GMT -5
I understand all of yours, Crawling, other than the Robot Monster... that episode was... very meh. Skydivers on the other hand is still one of my top 50, I still say "Get off of my land you credits!" during some of the opening scenes of movies.
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Post by Mighty Jack on Sept 6, 2014 1:25:39 GMT -5
I’ve posted a straight Top 10 frequently over the years, so let’s change it up a little.
Top 11… with a limit: I can only use one ep per season. This then, is my personal perfect overview of the show.
#11. The Last Chase (KTMA) – the movie is enjoyably dumb and there are some pointed riff darts for laughs.
#10. Project Moonbase (Season 1) – despite the 2 Cody’s, and the sexist characters and that Briteis does act the spoiled brat…. this one never fails to make me happy.
#9. Ring of Terror (Season 2) – Gray and tedious picture - but the humor, while one note, is hilarious. Top-notch skits as well.
#8. Boggy Creek II (Season 10) – It’s not my favorite flick, but it is comedy gold. The riffing is sharp and irreverent and does a great job teasing some unlikable people.
#7. Monster A-Go Go (Season 4) - Manos is marvelous, but “Go Go” cracks me up a little more. One of the very worst movies ever featured on MST inspires some wonderfully dark, observational quips.
#6. Pod People (Season 3) – The perfect storm of film, riff and skit. Though some would argue for Megalon, and Cave Dwellers makes a strong case for itself -- for me, this is MST3Ks first great masterpiece. It highlights the Best Brain’s in peak form, both in writing and performance. The riffing is quick, clever and fun. The movie is filled with memorable moments and characters.
#5. The Final Sacrifice (Season 9) – Just flat out great comedy, and a movie filled with 2 of the best characters… Zap and Troy.
#4. Night of the Blood Beast (Season 7) – Steve? The guys have a lot of fun playing with the cast of characters, the pregnancy plot and the chard parrot alien invader. Skits are a blast (both versions). This season is where things get a bit darker humor wise… maybe it’s the loss of that affable, pop culture brainiac, Frank? (Replaced by the ‘not as fun loving’ Pearl)
#3. The Beast of Yucca Flats (Season 6) – Painfully dry film. It’s a testament to how sharp these guys are that they were able to overcome the dull, use it, and create a comedy classic. Plus there are 2 winning shorts!
#2. Santa Claus (Season 5) – Santa, Satan and Merlin? This weird movie is on the receiving end of some side splitting quips.
#1. Jack Frost (Season 8) - Perfect, the jewel in the MST crown, with riffing that is goofy and often brilliant. The movie is an imaginative oddity, the kind that I adore. This is my “rainy day” episode, the one that never fails to put me in a good mood.
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Post by Mike Flugennock on Sept 7, 2014 18:07:18 GMT -5
Why not: ...10. The Day the Earth Froze I just rediscovered The Day The Earth Froze recently. I had a hard time with the Russo-Finnish movies initially; they all seemed to start really slowly and swamp me with overly lush visual style. Once I took another crack at The Sword And The Dragon -- and loved it -- I went back and checked out the others, and The Day The Earth Froze has to be my all-time favorite of the bunch. The "riff stream" is fsat and dense, and every riff is a killer, especially this one of Crow's: I'm not the pheasant plucker, I'm the pheasant plucker's son... I'm only plucking pheasants 'til the pheasant plucker comes...!I damn near died when I first heard that one, and it still busts me up every time I hear it. Beaulieu's delivery really makes it. The Day The Earth Froze is one of the most monstrous in a whole season full of monsters.
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Post by Phantom Engineer on Sept 7, 2014 19:04:47 GMT -5
I would just like to point out that perfect lists get in the way of very good lists. I said it and I stand by it.
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Post by geminiman112 on Sept 10, 2014 15:14:57 GMT -5
10. Hobgoblins
9. I Accuse My Parents
8. Track of the Moon Beast
7. Devil Fish
6. Time Chasers
5. Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
4. Laser Blast
3. Final Sacrifice
2. Puma Man
1. Manos
Honorable Mentions:
Mitchell Warrior of the Lost World Gamera vs. Zigra The Sidehackers Werewolf Girl in Gold Boots Overdrawn at the Memory Bank Pod People Prince of Space Samson vs. the Vampire Women Soul Taker
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Post by zurk on Sept 12, 2014 21:04:49 GMT -5
In no particularly deliberate order:
1. I Accuse My Parents 2. The Unearthly 3. The Atomic Brain 4. The Gunslinger 5. The Incredibly Strange Creatures... 6. Red Zone Cuba 7. Laserblast 8. Time Chasers 9. Overdrawn at the Memory Bank 10. parts: the clonus horror
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Post by crawlinghand on Sept 17, 2014 21:37:06 GMT -5
I understand all of yours, Crawling, other than the Robot Monster... that episode was... very meh. Skydivers on the other hand is still one of my top 50, I still say "Get off of my land you credits!" during some of the opening scenes of movies. When I was comprisising my list, I tried to balance out the episodes that I was choosing. Robot Monster is a bit of a slow episode. It sufferes from having Commando Cody and a couple of slow segments. Still, its one of the best season 1 episodes I've seen, and there's something really special about how bad this movie is.
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Post by RedTom on Sept 19, 2014 2:41:53 GMT -5
21. Escape 2000 Now when you know to leave the Bronx, you can leave the Bronx. Seriously, what other movie can make overacting italians seem like they're at least doing an entertaining job (IE, Toblerone). Trash is quite a weirdo hero, and the woman who is not hot at all has a voice that grates against any ear. I loved watching the disinfestation riffs along with the silver-men riffs all throughout. Favorite Riff: "He died as he died, dead." Favorite Skit: Pearl is rescued.
22. Hobgoblins Stupid, idiotic, and downright sadistic in many ways. Hobgoblin was a movie that was purposely bad just so that he would have a new feature out in stores (From what I understand, he recently brought out a new sequel in honor of the MST3K version of his movie). The monsters were obviously puppets and the humor was dryer than a damn bucket of dust. One of the worst movies they have ever done. Favorite Riff: "He tried to crowd surf but no one wanted to touch him." Favorite Skit: Cardboard cut outs
23. Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell Desperately terrible in many ways. It's good to give your hero flaws (as seen in Pumaman) but Deathstalker takes his flaw way too far. He is an arrogant douche that can't get over himself. The villain is no better, but the boys put on an awesome show with great riffs on almost every silly scene (especially the ones that go over the top in stupidity). Favorite Riff: "More snot meat anyone?" Favorite Skit: Making the ring of power.
24. The Giant Spider Invasion Why was everything in this movie so disgustingly grimy? The Spider, the scientists, and the rednecks. The riffs in this one left me rolling, especially on old Skipper! It tries to amount itself to Jaws, but it falls short by about 1000 miles to the south. The riffs really smite this movie a good one, and really does a good job in explaining the layers of dirt and filth that line its every corner. Favorite Riff: "Then add the ribs." Favorite Skit: Tom wants to go camping
25. Mitchell Our early look at Joe Don Baker, and the stupidity of making him a star of anything. The movie changes plots and jumps from villain to villain to villain until you stop caring about their names, and MST3K covers the confusion beautifully. This one is probably one of my very favorites with Joel in it (not as good as Cavedwellers though). Favorite Riff: "Stop or my heart will explode!" Favorite Skit: Mike activating the escape pod
26. Zombie Nightmare Wow, where to begin: The historically stupid voodoo woman, or the zombie and the terrible excuse for youth back in those days. With no one better than Adam West, the film is stiflingly painful, but the boys pull it off wonderfully, especially with most of the dumber parts (which is 80% of the film, give or take). Favorite Riff: "Is she part shee-e-e-e-eeep?" Favorite Skit: Bat Tom and Mike Robin.
27. Manos: The Hands of Fate What can be said? This has to be their very very top worst movie they have ever done. I didn't mean for it to be so low on my list, I do love it, but for some strange reason it's not the episode I think of when I think "MST3K". I do love Torgo, and the Master was a good source of laughs. This episode just got way too dry way too fast, and sometimes I just don't feel like watching it, so I end up watching one of my other favorites. This one still remains in my heart. Favorite Riff: Pull! My finger! Favorite Skit: Joel is the Master
28. This Island Earth The movie was a great source of MST3K in my early years of fandom. I do love to keep this one close to me at all times, because it is a very colorful, densely humored "episode." I love it when they make riffs on Joe at the beginning, then the ones they did for the big-headed alien guys. Beyond that, I loved the mu-tant. Favorite Riff: Cal! Cal! I'm Stuck! AAH--- Favorite Skit: Tom searches his room.
29. Skydivers Coleman Francis is a great source of laughs, no matter how much money he throws at a movie. He still loves coffee, and his movie grammar and action sequences lack any sign of life of any kind. There are plenty of great riffs in this one, and there's a lot of great stupid people with stupid things to say. Though it is the best movie Coleman Francis ever did. Favorite Riff: So how long have you liked coffee? Favorite Skit: The industrial arts!
30. The Undead Wow, Roger Corman cannot make films, period. There was so much horrible dialog in this one, it was like every single scene they knew exactly how to make themselves look like total idiots. I loved how they riffed on the wimpy-ass guards and knights in all of these scenes. As well as "noweth" which describes a lot of this movie's intelligence. The devil was the biggest retard in the entire film. Favorite Riff: That's a face... Favorite Skit: Digger Smolkin's record.
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