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Post by Weirdo Writer on Sept 11, 2015 20:00:42 GMT -5
Granted, but the fair is now held in January, with all that entails.
I wish I were capable of applying for jobs online without getting frustrated and losing my temper.
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Post by jkazoolien on Sept 12, 2015 0:23:56 GMT -5
Granted. You apply for jobs with so little emotion it creeps potential employees out and nobody wants to hire you.
I wish I hadn't of eaten all those Airheads.
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Post by Prime Minister Jim J. Bullock on Sept 13, 2015 8:02:54 GMT -5
Granted, but you now have a craving for Airheads.
I wish my neighbors would take in their trash cans.
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Post by Weirdo Writer on Sept 13, 2015 19:11:30 GMT -5
Granted, they take them into your house.
I wish I didn't have the flu.
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Post by jkazoolien on Sept 13, 2015 22:53:46 GMT -5
Granted. Now you have syphilis.
I wish I wasn't broke all the time.
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Post by Weirdo Writer on Sept 14, 2015 19:08:32 GMT -5
Granted, you've stolen massive enough amounts of money that you're on the FBI's Ten Most Wanted list.
I wish Kim Kardashian had never become famous.
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Post by jkazoolien on Sept 14, 2015 23:51:13 GMT -5
Granted. Now Paris Hilton is even more famous than she already is.
I wish my farts never stank.
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Post by Weirdo Writer on Sept 16, 2015 19:12:27 GMT -5
Granted. You're incapable of farting at all, because your anus has permanently sealed up.
I wish I had more of a social life.
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Post by jkazoolien on Sept 17, 2015 3:30:03 GMT -5
Granted. Now you hang out with muggers and drug dealers and are in constant fear for your life.
I wish for a sodey-pop.
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Post by Weirdo Writer on Sept 17, 2015 18:43:36 GMT -5
Granted, but your "sodey's" too cold! And that's too freakin' bad! You know where you can stick your freakin' "sodey"?!
I wish I didn't need so much caffeine.
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Post by jkazoolien on Sept 19, 2015 1:57:27 GMT -5
Granted. You switch to meth.
I wish my feces smelled like freshly-baked cinnamon rolls.
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Post by Prime Minister Jim J. Bullock on Sept 19, 2015 7:19:32 GMT -5
Granted but, this is so suspicious that everyone suspects you of doing drugs.
I wish i could find my keys.
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Post by jkazoolien on Sept 21, 2015 8:17:07 GMT -5
Granted. They're buried in a gigantic pile of cow poopie.
I wish for coffee.
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Post by Weirdo Writer on Sept 25, 2015 19:26:01 GMT -5
Granted. It's Kopi Luwak. I wish I could take a nice, long vacation in New York City.
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Post by jkazoolien on Sept 25, 2015 21:59:59 GMT -5
Granted. You stay in a flop house, get accosted by bums, and are unceremoniously stabbed over a slice of pizza.
I wish healthy food tasted good.
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