|
Post by sol-survivor on May 13, 2016 21:58:26 GMT -5
Granted. The guy with the B.O. and the uncontrollable gas wants to hang around with you all the time now.
I wish I had a bacon cheeseburger.
|
|
|
Post by Weirdo Writer on May 14, 2016 19:05:55 GMT -5
Granted. Right before that, you develop severe lactose intolerance.
I wish I had happier dreams.
|
|
|
Post by jkazoolien on May 14, 2016 23:28:55 GMT -5
Granted. Now all the terrible stuff keeps happening, but you find a penny just before you wake up. Good luck!
I wish my friends didn't want to go to Buffalo Wild Wings all the time.
|
|
|
Post by Weirdo Writer on May 18, 2016 18:44:17 GMT -5
Granted, they go to a restaurant that's more expensive, and whose food always gives you explosive diarrhea.
I wish I could be less cynical.
|
|
|
Post by jkazoolien on Jun 8, 2016 0:43:36 GMT -5
Granted. You're so hopelessly naive that everyone takes advantage of you.
I wish Weirdo would give me all his money.
|
|
|
Post by sol-survivor on Jul 23, 2016 22:22:58 GMT -5
Granted. Now you have change for a nickel.
I wish the DirecTV signal wouldn't go out in a storm.
|
|
|
Post by Weirdo Writer on Jul 24, 2016 12:05:06 GMT -5
Granted. Now not even storms can protect you from Jon Bon Jovi's reality-warping powers.
I wish it weren't so hot today.
|
|
|
Post by sol-survivor on Jul 30, 2016 9:24:47 GMT -5
Granted. Enjoy your own personal flurry.
I wish I wouldn't keep falling asleep on the couch.
|
|
|
Post by Prime Minister Jim J. Bullock on Aug 4, 2016 8:33:07 GMT -5
Granted, now you can't fall asleep at all not even while listening to Garrison Keillor narrate War and Peace.
I wish my newspaper had better comics.
|
|
|
Post by Weirdo Writer on Aug 4, 2016 18:20:40 GMT -5
Granted. It only runs original Far Side and Calvin and Hobbes[/i] strips, since neither Gary Larson not Bill Watterson is willing to come out of retirement.
I wish I had more money in my bank account.
|
|
|
Post by sol-survivor on Aug 13, 2016 23:26:28 GMT -5
Granted. Unfortunately, it's that darned Monopoly money again.
I wish I could have all the nice stuff I want and not have to pay for it.
|
|
|
Post by Weirdo Writer on Sept 10, 2016 20:25:10 GMT -5
Granted. You've sold your soul to the Devil.
I wish I didn't worry so much.
|
|
|
Post by sol-survivor on Sept 10, 2016 21:31:30 GMT -5
Granted. Now you don't care about anything. Good luck making new friends.
I wish someone would do something nice for me for once.
|
|
|
Post by Weirdo Writer on Sept 13, 2016 19:22:34 GMT -5
Granted, a cat presents you with a dead rat, as a gesture of love and respect. I wish Commander Salamander were still in business.
|
|
|
Post by sol-survivor on Nov 15, 2019 0:26:51 GMT -5
Granted. However, they no longer carry anything you would ever want.
I wish for a hamburger sammich and some french fried potatoes.
|
|