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Post by Vlad89 on Jul 29, 2004 23:57:59 GMT -5
Since Ator isn't updating his site, I'm going to post some of my reviews I send him.
604-"Zombie Nightmare" Rating: A
My Thoughts about the movie: Oh, man! This movie is just too unbearable to watch! I think I should better just list some of the good things in the movie: 1) The very hot Tia Carrere. 2) Motorhead's "Ace of Spades" song (It's the one that plays in the opening credits). 3) The coroner who looks like Burgess Meredith and speaks in a funny deep voice. 4) Adam West and Frank Dietz (The detective who looks like Conan O'Brien). Even though this is a b-movie, they actually played their roles very well, in my opinion. 5) The disgusting and annoying teenager Jim (The one with Farah Fawcett hair) gets killed (Too bad BBI cut out his death scene... or the original cut probably didn't have the death scene at all) Wow, that's a lot of good qualities for such an awful movie. But sadly, those qualities didn't save the movie at all. Everything is just bad in this movie, from plot to acting to suspense factor to soundtrack (I admit, I'm a fan of 80's music. Yet, I HATED this movie's soundtrack). Also, this movie is even more disgusting and sleazy than "HOBGOBLINS", IMHO. This is one of the worst 80's movies BBI had ever made fun of, next to "City Limits", "Escape 2000" and "Overdrawn At The Memory Bank. In conclusion: this movie is really a zombie nightmare (Pun intended).
My Thoughts about the show: When I first saw this episode, I gave it a "B-", because the movie was too hard to watch. Then, I saw it a second time and I enjoyed this episode on a "B+" level. Now, it got even better and it's an "A" episode for me. Mike and the 'bots riff this movie to shreds, which really deserves it. The riffs on Jon Mikl Thor, Adam West and bad soundtrack were classic. This episode was fun, but it won't get an "A+" because of the 2nd movie segment. The scenes with Molly Mokembe's incomprehensible babbling were unbearable and the crew barely saved them. The riffing does pick up its pace when Zombie Thor murders the teenagers in a hot tub.
I didn't really care for the host segments. "Tom and Crow the bodyguards", "Reeanacting of the hit-and-run scene from the movie" and "Letters to Adam West" were lame skits. "The Hot Tub" sketch offered some laughs, but it's not very memorable. On the other hand, the "Voodoo Dolls" and "Batman" host segments were funny.
Trivia: Shawn Levy (Jim) went on to direct such movies like "Big Fat Liar", "Just Married", "Cheaper by The Dozen" and others.
In conclusion: A very funny episode that ages well. Beware the awfulness of the movie though.
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Post by Vlad89 on Jul 29, 2004 23:58:38 GMT -5
904-"Werewolf" Rating: A
My thoughts about the film: You know, I actually enjoy most of the 90's movies BBI made fun of unlike the 80's b-movies. "Soultaker"? Bad, but the premise was very interesting. "Future War"? That movie was so bad it's funny. "Final Sacrifice"? "Time Chasers"? They both stink, but they're somewhat watchable. "Quest of The Delta Knights"? "Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders"? Haven't seen them yet. What about "Werewolf"? Now that movie sucks! Sometimes when I watch this movie, I ask myself "Did the director take directing lessons from Larry Buchanan?". As you can see, the movie has dumb editing, awful soundtrack, bad sound effects (What's the deal with the table saw sound in the soundtrack?) and just about everything. It comes to the point that you realize director Tony Zarindast didn't care about his movie at all, just like Buchanan. Did you see the fight scene between a werewolf and Yuri in the end? Man, that was PATHETIC! And what's the deal with Sam The Groundskeeper? Why is he dressed up like Fidel Castro? Definitely the worst 90's movie BBI had ever dug out from a cheap video store!
My thoughts about the show: The riffing makes this episode one of the season 9 highlights. I really loved the riffs on the Indian guy (The one who is first to become a werewolf), Sam The Groundskeeper and Paul the main werewolf. The only weak spot were the end credits, where they sing a medley of songs. Hmm... they can do better than that. The end credits would had been better if they came up with their original songs, like "Leave The Bronx" in "Escape 2000" or "Rowsdower saves us and the entire world" in "Final Sacrifice". The rest of the riffing was so good I wanted to give this episode an "A+", but I think that "Hobgoblins", "Final Sacrifice" and "Devil Fish" were better season 9 episode, IMHO.
The host segments were a mixed bag. They started off great with "Mike thinks he's James Lipton", "Mike's escape plan" and "Ideal werewolf movie casts" sketches, then they went down the hill with the overrated "Where, Oh Werewolf?" song and average "Mike The Werecrow" skits (Great idea, but they could have done it better).
In conclusion: Not the most classic season 9 episode, but it's still one of the best.
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Post by Vlad89 on Jul 29, 2004 23:59:02 GMT -5
1004-"Future War" Rating: B+
My thoughts about the film: This is one of the most unoriginal movies ever featured on MST3K, next to "Warrior of The Lost World". First of all, the opening sequence (The one with a cheap Battlestar Galactica-like ship) rips off the opening sequences in "Alien" movies, the "cyborgs hunt for our main hero" plotline was in "Terminator" movies, the cyborgs' POV rips off the Predator's POV in "Predator" movies, the puppet dinosaurs look like the ones in "Carnosaur" movies and it even rips off a MSTed movie "Being From Another Planet" with the dinosaurs' red filtered POV, which looked just like the alien mummy's green filtered POV (Or maybe not. I don't know. That kind of filtered POV appeared in lots of movies). And let's not forget Daniel Bernhardt the cheap rip-off of Jean Claude Van Damme. Still, I kind of enjoyed this movie. The goofy-looking terminators, the cheap dinosaur puppets, bad editing, Daniel Bernhardt's acting and a funny scene where Daniel experiences a "wardrobe malfunction" make this movie unintentionally funny and cheesy.
My thoughts about the show: It starts off perfectly with funny riffs on fight scenes, the Terminaotr Clown and Daniel Bernhardt (Whom Mike and the 'bots call "Jean Claude Gosh Darn"), when the 2nd movie segments starts the riffing slows down untill the box factory scene in the 3rd movie segment and it continues great with hillarious insults on puppet dinosaurs, boxes, bad editing, street gang, SWAT team, the Freddie Mercury Terminator with a giant chin, repeated water reservoir scene from beggining of the movie and more goofy fight scenes. Still, I liked the riffs on fat guys and religion in "weak" parts. But I don't reccomend overwatching this epiosde, because the quality can change drastically.
The host segments were okay, except for the lame "Mike's Big Chin" sketch and the funny "LSD Tests" skit (I loved Brain Guy's impersonation of Jimi Hendrix).
In conclusion: A great underrated episode that's worth watching! But you should better have a good collection of other MST3K episodes to prevent this episode (And others) from getting too old.
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Post by Vlad89 on Jul 30, 2004 0:00:37 GMT -5
706-"Laserblast" Rating: C+
My Thoughts About The Film: Personally, I didn't feel surprised that Leonard Maltin gave this movie a 2 1/2 star rating (But giving "The Incredibly Strange Creatures..." 2 1/2 stars and "The Undead" 3 stars is a different story). This movie has Roddy McDowall, cool-looking claymated aliens, a couple of dumb cops to laugh at and an Eddie Deezen death scene. That's good, isn't it? Well, yeah. Sadly, those are the only highlights of the movie! What's the deal with all of the plot holes? Did a script writer accidentally drop the script into a paper shredding machine and try to glue all of the recovered pages into a new and confusing story? Why is Kathy's grandpa crazy and why does he hate Billy? Why do those dumb cops harass Billy? Why didn't aliens take away the laserblasting gun? Why their lines are left untranslated? Who is that Bill Bixby/Michael Landon guy? Who is he? An FBI agent? A paranormal activity researcher? Why do people who use the laserblasting gun turn into monsters? We will never know!
My Thoughts About The Show: Just like Mighty Jack, Don and Greg Eichelberger, I found this popular episode to be disappointing. I loved the jokes on dumb cops ("Starsky and Hutch have been together a little too long."; "Dirty and Hairy"; various "ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL?!!" gags; "WATCH AS THE COPS... forget something."), claymated aliens ("Great, E.T. calls, we come and he's not here!"; "Hey, Wally, come on and help me find Roswell!") and their cheap-looking ship which looks like a razor ("Cleaner shave, cleaner shave, smoother all the way!"), references to previous Coleman Francis episodes ("It's The Coleman Francis Mountain!"; "Red Zone Cuba III: The Destruction of Cherokee Jack") and other moments like Eddie Deezen-bashing and Laserblasting scenes. The rest of the riffing was kind of average and boring. I didn't care for the host segments either! "Mike Nelson IS Captain Janeway" and "Dr F's funding gets cut" were funny; "A field of Star Babies" and "MONAD Bot" weren't special and add little to the quality of the episode; "Beyond The Thunderdome gag" sucked and the final host segment where Dr F turns into a Star Baby a la "2001: A Space Odyssey" and Mike and the 'bots turn into pure energy was good, but very sad. It's a good thing the show didn't end on this note, but continued in the awesomely underrated Sci-Fi era and ended perfectly in "Diabolik".
In Conclusion: Not a bad episode, but too average for my tastes. Recommended if you like claymated aliens and watching Billy laserblast... stuff.
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Torgo
Moderator Emeritus
-segment with Crow?
Posts: 15,420
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Post by Torgo on Jul 30, 2004 5:36:39 GMT -5
904-"Werewolf" Rating: A My thoughts about the film: You know, I actually enjoy most of the 90's movies BBI made fun of unlike the 80's b-movies. "Soultaker"? Bad, but the premise was very interesting. "Future War"? That movie was so bad it's funny. "Final Sacrifice"? "Time Chasers"? They both stink, but they're somewhat watchable. "Quest of The Delta Knights"? "Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders"? Haven't seen them yet. What about "Werewolf"? Now that movie sucks! Sometimes when I watch this movie, I ask myself "Did the director take directing lessons from Larry Buchanan?". As you can see, the movie has dumb editing, awful soundtrack, bad sound effects (What's the deal with the table saw sound in the soundtrack?) and just about everything. It comes to the point that you realize director Tony Zarindast didn't care about his movie at all, just like Buchanan. Did you see the fight scene between a werewolf and Yuri in the end? Man, that was PATHETIC! And what's the deal with Sam The Groundskeeper? Why is he dressed up like Fidel Castro? Definitely the worst 90's movie BBI had ever dug out from a cheap video store! My thoughts about the show: The riffing makes this episode one of the season 9 highlights. I really loved the riffs on the Indian guy (The one who is first to become a werewolf), Sam The Groundskeeper and Paul the main werewolf. The only weak spot were the end credits, where they sing a medley of songs. Hmm... they can do better than that. The end credits would had been better if they came up with their original songs, like "Leave The Bronx" in "Escape 2000" or "Rowsdower saves us and the entire world" in "Final Sacrifice". The rest of the riffing was so good I wanted to give this episode an "A+", but I think that "Hobgoblins", "Final Sacrifice" and "Devil Fish" were better season 9 episode, IMHO. The host segments were a mixed bag. They started off great with "Mike thinks he's James Lipton", "Mike's escape plan" and "Ideal werewolf movie casts" sketches, then they went down the hill with the overrated "Where, Oh Werewolf?" song and average "Mike The Werecrow" skits (Great idea, but they could have done it better). In conclusion: Not the most classic season 9 episode, but it's still one of the best. Allright! As soon as he updates his site, he'll have all four of us with a review of Werewolf.
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Post by Vlad89 on Jul 30, 2004 6:05:34 GMT -5
Damn! Forgot another review!
820-"Space Mutiny" Rating: A+
My thoughts about the movie: I take back all of the words I said about Laserblast's continuity, because I have no idea what happened in this movie! For example, if Calgon blew up the septic tanks to block the entrances to Southern Sun, how did his back-up army get in there in the second half of the movie? Or were they already in the ship? If so, why did Captain Santa Claus took them aboard? I mean, it's easy to tell a difference between a good guy and a space pirate in this movie, because they were wearing differently colored suits (White/light blue=Good guys, brown/red=bad guys, white straitjackets=anyone who saw this movie unMSTed). And why did Calgon have to stage a violent mutiny because he and his army wanted to live in the already overpopulated Earth? Wouldn't it be just easier to talk it over with Captain Santa Claus? That way, nobody would get killed, Calgon wouldn't get a lump of coal next Christmas and most importantly, this movie would never be made. And what's the deal with The Bellerians? Ah, forget it! The plot makes my head hurt! Lots of people say that this movie is enjoyably cheesy. Well, I disagree! Like most of the 80's movies shown on MST3K, this one is painful (With the exceptions of Master Ninja I, Final Justice, the laughable Alien From L.A. and the underrated Being From Another Planet). Everything is just pathetically bad in this movie from costumes to soundtrack (The ironic thing is, that I like 80's music... except for this one) to completely unexciting action sequences. And what's the deal with Lea?! Is the director some kind of a sick horny freak that gets turned on by grandmas that had more plastic surgeries than Michael Jackson and Cher combined? The scenes where she dances, has sex with Blast HardCheese and seduces a Phil Collins-look-alike were DISGUSTING!!! Oh well, at least this movie has a funny scenes where Bob Johnson (Oh wait...) screams like Michael Jackson and MacPhearson chews the scenery.
My thoughts about the show: The riffing is very perfect! From riffs on credits ("Passed from editor to editor in a desperate attempt to save it"), the entire cast, boring action sequences, cheap sets (Even Roger Corman movies had better looking sets that this one). Everything is just riffed perfectly! Hell, I'm not going to give examples of riffs, check it out for yourself! The only complaints are the annoying "Oi!" riffs on The Mark Jackson look-alike. Sure, he does look like him, but he also looks like Sting and Billy Idol. And what do we get? Only 2 Sting references, 0 Billy Idol jokes and too many Mark Jackson quotes! And how come they didn't do a "Parts: The Clonus Horror" riff during a freezer room scene, the one with dead bodies hanging in plastic wraps and Al Lewis look-alike guarding the place.
As for the host segments, I liked ALL of them... except for the "Is Crow a Bellerian?" and the last "Escape from Rome" bits. The sketch with railings was the one I liked the most.
In conclusion: Not just the best episode from Season 8, it's one of the best episodes from The Sci-Fi era ever! Recommended!
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Post by vanhagar3000 on Oct 22, 2004 22:29:28 GMT -5
Are you ever going to do reviews again?
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Post by Vlad89 on Nov 3, 2004 10:15:30 GMT -5
Are you ever going to do reviews again? My reviews will be on Ator's site. Since he is finally updating it, they will be soon. I have send Ator a review of "Night of The Blood Beast" and I'm almost finished with the one for "Escape 2000".
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Post by SOL Stowaway on Feb 13, 2006 1:35:36 GMT -5
Great reviews! If you still havn't seen "Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders" & "Quest of the Delta knights", I'm sure you'll consider Merlin's shop funny and rather watchable. As for Quest...not so much
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Post by Vlad89 on Feb 14, 2006 12:39:32 GMT -5
Great reviews! If you still havn't seen "Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders" & "Quest of the Delta knights", I'm sure you'll consider Merlin's shop funny and rather watchable. As for Quest...not so much I'm sorry, I don't do reviews any more. I lost interest in it. I did see Merlin's Shop (Good episode, but doesn't age well on repeated viewing) and Delta Knights (The Worst Sci-Fi era episode, IMO).
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Post by Cleolanta on Feb 15, 2006 21:46:16 GMT -5
Now that I've finally seen it myself, I EXTREMELY agree with everything you said about Zombie Nightmare. My gods, was that movie _sleazy_! I felt like I needed to take a super hot shower and scrub myself with steel wool to get that movie off of myself, afterwards...but even that would never remove the stains upon my soul. Or merely get me that hour and a half of my life back, which I'd settle for.
I too was really disappointed that they never showed the death scene of that horrible obnoxious sleazy disgusting chauvanist pig perverted psycho murderer bitch brat kid. I wanted to see him DIE, dammit. I wanted to see him WRITHING IN HORRIBLE AGONY. He's my new Most Hated MSTed Character Ever, in case you haven't figured out. My GODS I hated him!
...anyway. Sorry. I just have a loooootttt of anger and hostility to work out after seeing that movie, and I doubt the wounds will ever truly heal...
On the other hand, I also loved the riffs about the music. "She's being stalked by Depeche Mode!" and Tom suddenly bursting into "Rio" by Duran Duran towards the end... :P But that isn't enough to make the hurt go away.
...Notorious
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