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Post by Diet Kolos on Jul 4, 2018 21:20:53 GMT -5
Another feature of the Milling Around Festival: a new episode gets reviewed.
Next episode!
113-The Black Scorpion
Movie:
A volcano in Mexico unleashes giant, deadly, prehistoric scorpions. A pair of American and Mexican geologists investigate. The American, Doctor Scott, is more interested in investigating the local cattle baroness. Her shrill child of indeterminate relation does what all terribly annoying children do in these kinds of films: gets in the way and screams like a fishwife.
The titular giant black scorpion is eventually electrocuted with a spear to the throat in a football stadium.
Host Segments:
Prologue: Joel introduces the show and parties with the bots. Segment 1: The Mads are horribly mutated. Leafblower-powered party favor. Segment 2: Joel and the bots try to speak Spanish. Segment 3: Gypsy turns into a scorpion and eats Tom. Segment 4: Joel talks about stop-motion animation. Segment 5: Letters.
Things that I noticed:
-Crow’s mouth string is still there, but it’s a bit thinner this time.
-Pretty good special effects make-up effects on Dr. E, some of the more elaborate make-up ever featured on the show, really.
-Pretty good puppetry on the Dr. F skeleton puppet.
-The distracting visual gags are back. Joel and the bots roast weenies over footage of lava.
-I will say, by this point in the Season, Josh has FINALLY found the right delivery for Tom in the theater, and his Tom is finally growing on me. Too little, too late.
-The stop motion is by Willis O’Brien, not Ray Harryhausen. Some of creepy crawlers in the subterranean cave were originally designed by him for the legendary spider-pit scene that was cut from “King Kong”.
-Callbacks: Crow things the lava field is where they filmed Robot Monster. “Scorpions like this always keep beer around” from Crawling Hand.
-Gypsy’s scorpion add-ons look pretty good even though her tail falls off. She’s got angry googly eyes at the end, which we barely see, but are still pretty funny.
-The droning background noise on the bridge (which may in fact be new for this episode), is very loud in Segment 4.
-The letter in Segment 5 is dated January 29, 1990. This episode premiered on February 3, 1990. I guess when they said the production of Season 1 was rushed, they weren’t kidding around! Cripes, that’s a short turnaround. Let’s break this down: 1.Let’s assume the letter was local (Joel doesn’t say where it’s from), the mail service is efficient, and it took a day to get to the BBI studios. So it’s received on January 30 (a Tuesday). 2.It probably is read with a bunch of other letters and is chosen as the letter for this week’s episode, and let’s assume this is done on it’s own day, and since mail usually arrives around noon, we’re going to be generous and say it’s received and read on the same day, January 30. 3.This week’s episode is already in production at this point and should’ve already been written. The 10-day format for episodes wouldn’t be formalized until Season 2, so they’re probably rushing. 1 day for theater segments, 1 day for host segments. No dress rehearsals at this point. Presumably in that order. 4.The host segments would be shot the day AFTER the letter is received, January 31. 5.The episodes is then edited with minor ADR and obviously no re-shoots the next day, February 1. It’s finished and shipped express to The Comedy Channel’s offices in New York City, which back then must’ve been prohibitively expensive to ship anything that quickly, much less a tape, where it… 6.Arrives in the channel headquarters at HBO Downtown Productions on February 2 where it’s quickly reviewed for content (or not) and loaded in to their systems where it can… 7.Air at noon on February 3. Yikes. No wonder stories of the show in Season 1 sound like a nightmare. And it helps explain why the quality of the shows wasn’t great - it was horribly rushed!
-Oh, and the letter ends with the fan requesting a year’s supply of Spacom.
-Some of the first great puppetry from Trace in Segment 5 on Crow. The close-up was a great idea.
Favorite riffs or quotes:
-Joel: Looks like it’s from the old M*A*S*H set.
-Doctor Scott: I didn’t use Spanish on her. Tom: I used Greek. Really confused the hell out of her!
-Tom: I’m going to move this high-voltage line with this piece of metal, let me just dip it in water first.
-Crow: This house is filled with Christmas trees!
-Joel: It’s Dale Evans, and I thought she was stuffed! Crow: Just mounted.
-Crow: The Milling Festival over, the villagers are loaded onto flatbed trucks like so many cattle.
-Crow: He’s making a taco salad where you can actually eat the bowl!
-Joel: Mrs. Butterworth, help!
-Joel: Good, make sure they can see us, thanks.
-Crow: I was afraid of this: scorpion hobos.
-Tom: Sort of like a surreal version of the Chuck Wagon commercials.
Overall:
It was a bit of a mistake to choose this film to riff on. I don’t want to say that it’s too good for the show, per se, but it certainly isn’t as a bad as the other fare featured on the show. Sure, some of the scorpion scenes are a little goofy, but the special effects are pretty effective. The riffing is consistent in density with the prior 2 episodes, but the episode provides fewer opportunities for jokes, and most opportunities given are used up on repetitive Mexican jokes, usually involving food. Or annoying clapping. The riffing in the second half of the movie plateaus and really doesn’t do much with what it’s given, especially the cavern scene with all the stop-motion bugs.
The host segments all have the annoying habit that most other late-Season 1 segments have: lots of build-up for almost zero payoff. While all are somewhat cute, they’re all conspicuously missing “jokes” or “payoffs”. The Gypsy-as-a-scorpion bit is clever, has a build-up and then just ENDS. Same for the speaking Spanish bit.
A bit of a step-down from the last few episodes, where they were making some good progress, which makes this episode so disappointing.
Score: C
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Post by Diet Kolos on Jul 8, 2018 18:59:15 GMT -5
By the time I was done, I could review every episode around. I knew the metaphors, similes, grammar, all that. The obscure references. Even the callbacks like…HI-KEEBA!!! *does a flip and falls on his back*
Next episode!
104-Women of the Prehistoric Planet
Movie:
This one needs lots of exposition…bear with me…
Out in space, a space fleet with ship sets that Captain Kirk would’ve been embarrassed to serve on, led by a space admiral played by a drunk space Wendell Corey, heads towards home from Centaurus, a space planet that’s out in space. The stuffy white people, evidently humans, who run the space fleet are bringing home a bunch of refugees from Centaurus, who all just so happen to be East Asian with stereotypical accents, names, even their outfits. Most of the humans are racists, but some aren’t.
ANYWAYS, one of the ships in the space convoy has an uprising from their Centaurans and crashes on a planet. The lead ship with the admiral ignores his orders from home and turns around to go save the crashed ship. Thanks to a very simplified (but somehow smarter than the rest of this movie) little explanations involving time dilation, by the time they reach the crashed ship, it’s been 18 years.
By this time, two of the survivors of the crash (an interracial couple that’s briefly mentioned once! Facile progress!) have a child, Tang. One of the Centaurans, Linda, leaves the ship once they land and falls in love with Tang.
Ok, and that’s all within the first 30 minutes!
After that the movie wanders around the same jungle set for 40 minutes, there’s some hairy cavemen, a bad comedian does some pratfalls, Wendell Corey yells “Linda!” a few times, and then the movies dumps a few twists on us. Linda was Admiral Wendell Corey’s illegitimate daughter. Oh, and Tang and Linda are Adam and Eve. It was Earth all along. I guess that means Wendell Corey was God.
Host Segments:
Prologue: Joel “redecorates” the bridge by adding a couch. Segment 1: Clay and Lar’s Flesh Barn. Joel makes toilet paper in a soda bottle. Segment 2: Joel brings a doomsday satellite onto the bridge. Segment 3: Joel tries to decode the Isaac Asimov Literary Doomsday Machine. Segment 4: The Doomsday Machine turns Joel and the bots into Isaac Asimov. Segment 5: Letters. Winner of the Avocado Guy contest.
Things that I noticed:
-Crow’s mouth string is still there, and it’s still as thick as last week.
-The bots are in the Prologue, but don’t talk, save for Crow saying “ick”.
-The Prologue is the first (and probably only) time the bridge console is lowered halfway. It would be lowered all the way/removed a few timed in Season 2 and once or twice in Season 5. It was a good design idea when they made the set, and shows that most of the base design elements of the show are there in Season 1, just underutilized.
-At this point, it appears that after a dozen episodes, they’ve finally run through all of Joel’s stand-up props for Inventions. Well, the open flames were fun while they lasted, but in their stead is the first really good invention, Clay and Lar’s Flesh Barn.
-The Flesh Barn song is the first song sung in a host segment of the national run, and the only one sung by Josh.
-The Flesh Barn model itself is Kentucky Fried Chicken model that would go on to be the “Home of the Big “G” Burger” used in the opening credits and intersitials used from Seasons 2 through 5. Note the cow halves in the sign.
-There’s a fair bit of ADR in this episode in the theater segments, mostly from Joel. It’s noticeable because the audio doesn’t match the surrounding riffs. ADR is something they’d do here and there in Season 2 with high noticeably, but they’d eventually make it less noticeable with time.
-The movie doesn’t explicitly say what happened to Centaurus, or why they’re bringing Centaurans with them. But they do mention colonies a few times. And the Centaurans have to distrust the space people for SOME reason. I’m going to assume Wendell Corey and his space fleet conquered Centaurus by force decades ago, either directly or indirectly, took their resources and land and eventually felt bad about it.
-Tom calls one of the characters “Johnny Longtorso” 3 seasons before the Invention Exchange for it.
-The exterior shot of the SOL and doomsday satellite features the MST3K moon in the lower left corner, the only time it’s ever used for anything other than it’s original purpose.
-The doomsday satellite itself is a neat prop. Note the red solo cups doubling as RCS thrusters.
-I don’t get the Isaac Asimov jokes. They all leave me cold. I’m guessing he was a jerk?
-That’s Mike Nelson as the voice of the doomsday machine, in his first acting part on the show.
-This episode is the originator of the “Hi-keeba!” riff which would carry on throughout the rest of series. This episode also originates the “Linda!” riff that Joel would employ throughout Season 2 into early Season 3.
-Wendell Corey was soaked in booze during this whole movie. Just stinking. Moreso than even Lon Chaney, Jr. He died less than 2 years after this movie was made from cirrhosis of the liver.
Favorite riffs or quotes:
-Crow: It’s so beautiful…it looks like crud on a windshield.
-Crow: All from the horoscope charts he got from Nancy Reagan.
-Joel: So concerned, I felt the need the touch you.
-Tom: And that playground ball is a threat, too.
-Crow: Let’s try and find your scalp.
-Tom: Kill your brother. It’s the only way to reinforce the director’s white male reality.
-Tom: Who knew lizards were so flammable?
-Crow: He’ll be riding in the trunk on the way back to Earth.
-Linda: Your mother and father, where are they? Joel: You’re wearing them.
-Tom: How horrible, to be killed by a plush toy.
-Joel: Did he just get a shot of novocaine? Crow: J.D.
-Tom: Ah, the Samuel Beckett method.
-Joel: I’m gonna go spank myself.
-Joel: Tang will settle to bottom, must stir.
-Joel: That means my great-great grandmother was really hot.
Overall:
Well, here we are, the end of Season 1. Imagine if the Comedy Channel hadn’t renewed them for Season 2. It would’ve been the KTMA season and this one. A semi-obscure show with a niche audience would’ve been a completely obscure show. The tape quality of the traded Season 1 episodes before DVD’s was abysmal, so I can’t imagine it would’ve found much of a cult following after cancellation. Maybe they would’ve gotten back onto KTMA, or perhaps another cheap cable start-up. In any case, it’s a miracle that they WERE renewed, if we’re being honest. It really goes to show how strapped for content the Comedy Channel was for programming. But it all worked out, Season 2 is a massive step up in quality, almost instantly.
I feel bad for Josh Weinstein, he finally just started to find his voice at the end of the Season in the theater. I’m sure, as with all 18 year-olds, he would’ve matured and his writing and performance improved. From the way he’s told it in interviews, it sounds a bit like he was set up for failure. But he WAS 18, after all. I’m not sure how he would’ve fared in a writing room with 30-somethings.
Anyways…this episode. The movie is a pretty good selection. There’s a fair bit to comment on: the cheap sets, the blatant racism, etc. But, like all of Season 1, it’s missed opportunities. Riffing starts a bit slow. It probably doesn’t help that the film spends 45 minutes in tiny, dull spaceship sets. It picks up once everyone’s on the planet, and continues through the episode at a slow and steady rate with the occasional laugh-out-loud moment. Again, like most of late Season 1.
The host segments are all duds for me, save the Invention Exchange. The Flesh Barn is my favorite invention of Season 1. Dark, creative and with a song. Love it. The Isaac Asimov bits are dead ends that feel more like the writers’ inside jokes. Really, Segments 2 through 4 could’ve been condensed down into one segment, maybe 2. Completely non-sequitur and unfunny, which is going to hold back the grade for the episode, unfortunately.
They found a comfortable riffing level late in the season, but they just hadn’t yet figured out the host segments. Perhaps it’s the same problems I think they had with 113: they ran out of time and had to slap an episode together quickly. A shame this is how they had to end the season.
Score: C
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Post by CrowTrobotfan92 on Jul 28, 2018 17:04:04 GMT -5
Oh, I’d hate to review a butt like that. Next episode! 102-The Robot vs. The Aztec Mummy w/Short: Commando Cody and The Radar Men From the Moon 1 . Short: Effeminate Moonmen use their atomic death rays to destroy vital Earth infrastructure. Presumably so they can more easily colonize. Commando Cody, kind of a cheap Rocketeer, flies to the moon with his dead weight friends to confront the Moon people, who obligingly tell him their evil plan, how their weapons work, and all their Google passwords. Movie: Told via a series of several flashbacks, some within each other. A Mexican scientist, Edward, details to his guests his discovery of an Aztec mummy, even though his guests were there for it and already know all about it. Conveniently, his daughter was the mummy’s love in a past life, so she’s ripe for abducting, which does happen to her several times throughout the film. The evil Dr. Krupp wants the Aztec treasures and makes a boxy robot to fight the mummy, which it does, for all of 10 seconds. Host Segments:Prologue: N/A Segment 1: The Mads discuss going to the Mad Scientist Convention. The airbag helmet. The Chalkman. Segment 2: Demon Dogs start massing on the ship. Segment 3: Enoch the king of the demon dogs appears and offers peach. Then Gypsy eats him. Segment 4: Crow pretends to be Enoch. Segment 5: The demon dogs invade the ship. Things that I noticed:-Watching a taped copy from November ‘95 when BBI relented and let Comedy Central show some season 1 episodes. It goes straight to commercial after the opening intro. -This episode is 99 minutes long, 2 minutes longer than the early standard running time. They apparently hadn’t hit on a standard yet. -The bots aren’t in Segment 1 at all. -The booby-trap in Segment 1 is some nice physical humor. Trace pulls it off beautifully. Josh…less so. -Joel puts his hand over a singing woman’s mouth, partially muting her. Its a clever gag, but it breaks the narrative logic of the show. Its distracting and takes you out of the experience. Same thing with the cue cards bit they do later in the season. And the urinating scene this same episode. And a few other visual/audio gags they do throughout Season 1. They all smell of Joel’s over-inventiveness. Sure enough, their obtrusive ilk would return in Season 11 to distract from the movie. -This early iteration of Gypsy features long, clear plastic tubes coming out of the back of her head. Favorite riffs or quotes:-Dr. F: The third time, I used the incendiaries. It didn’t make the building blow up, it just made it burn…really quickly. God, that was beautiful, wasn’t it? -Tom: Oh, I hate to shoot a butt like that. -Tom: I thought that was a smoke detector! -Edward: Its about the Aztec breastplate and bracelet, gentlemen. Joel: I put them on at night and dance. -Tom: The evil Judge Robert Bork. -Tom: It’s an Aztec IUD. -Enoch: Let us explain pleasantries, then we will drink Tranya. Crow: From a bowl on the floor, boy? -Crow: Every good laboratory has a pit full of rattlers. -Joel: All mummies carry pliers. Overall: God the movie in this episode is slow and boring. I can’t imagine what the people watching the show’s premiere were thinking as they watched an uninteresting movie, with sparse riffing under it. I don’t think any of them thought it would last 10 seasons. This episode certainly doesn’t warrant it. Of course, this early in the season, when talking about quality, its a question of small intervals. “Good” isn’t that good. And “godawful” is just a bit worse than that. And only 2 episodes in, comparisons don’t mean much. But this episode is much worse than 101. The movie is a complete turd. Nothing happens. Less than nothing. And the short is nearly as inert, but it does have a few moments. Just…a really bad episode. Score: D- Leave a comment, this means you! I watched this episode high, and even that made it barely tolerable.
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Post by Diet Kolos on Dec 30, 2018 21:31:16 GMT -5
This review had a a bad mother.
Next episode!
501-Warrior of the Lost World
Movie:
In a generic post-apocalypse world, an unnamed hero on a motorcycle comes out of the wilderness to save all the post-apocalyptic stereotypes. No, this isn’t City Limits, that movie had a budget.
This movie was filmed quickly and cheaply by David Worth for an Italian studio, apparently as a Mad Max knock-off. For what it is, it actually has a decent cast of has-been’s and never-was’s (Fred Williamson! Robert Ginty! Persis Khambatta! Donald Pleasence!).
But, I digress. Standard post-apocalypse plot. Guy with no name rides in on talking motorcycle, there’s a bunch of car chases, fights against Evil Corporation, gets girl.
Specifically, Guy-With-No name crashes through an invisible wall and gets hired by…what are they? Pixies? Gods? Old people in bedsheets?…to fight against the generic Evil Corporation/Government, The Omega, where Donald Pleasence rules with an iron fist and a bored expression. Why? Who are these people? Is Donald’s government bad? Why?
But I digress again. Come to think of it, most of this movie is just a series of digressions and half-formed concepts. I’m not even sure why I’m trying to describe the plot. You figure it out.
Host Segments:
Prologue: Tom introduces the show. Segment 1: Square Master. Bittersweet Hearts. Segment 2: Joel retrofits the bots as slot cars. Segment 3: Joel and the bots make a Steve Allen sketch. Segment 4: Plans for the apocalypse. Segment 5: MegaWeapon calls from Tampa.
Things that I noticed:
-Per the slate card, this episode was filmed (or edited) on 2/08/93, less than a month, 26 days, from 424. As such, I almost consider this Episode 425.
-The drafting table in the bakground of Segment 1 was last seen in Episode 312. There looks to be a mug with Gizmonic logo on it.
-I love the free-association when the motorcycle comes into view through the heat coming off the highway, giving it an indiscernible mass, mostly because it looks like ALL those things.
-While it may appear that Robert Ginty has unusually large cheeks in this film, after some research I can confirm that’s just how he always looked.
-According to Project RIFF, this episode has the 3rd highest number of riffs per minute in the original 10 seasons, behind Day the Earth Froze and King Dinosaur. A possible reason for this is the relative lack of soundtrack. Most of the driving scenes have no music at all. And any scene with music, its usually very quiet.
-”Dickheads” was apparently censored for TV by muting the audio, but remains clearly on Einstein’s screen.
-A rare KTMA callback when Crow namechecks the movie from K19, Hangar 18.
-Another bit of censorship, Persis originally convinces Paper Chase Guy to help rescue her father by taking his gun and pointing it at his batch while she explains why he should help. That’s why he looks down and she fires the gun in the air.
-A rare call-forward! Crow’s “I accuse my parents”.
-Dr. F’s tennis racket in Segment 5 is warped.
-A few other differences from the uncut version of the film on Youtube: 1.There’s much longer version of the title crawl, giving more details of just who everyone is. And you can actually read it, unlike the Star Wars-inspired version used in the Episode. 2.A fairly pointless sequence was cut just after Robert Ginty gets shot at by the geeks in the junkyard. He gets chased by Nazis through a field strewn with junked cars and even gets shot off his bike at one point. The end of this sequence is seen in the episode before he drives into a wall. 3.After he’s healed, we’re shown some of the idealist good guy society “The New Way”, consisting of good-natured people practicing swordplay and hand-to-hand contact. 4.After the spiders and snakes, they’re attacked by mutants in the tunnels. 5.A few extra shots of the “Video Visceral Process”. 6.A scene showing how Omega executes people. The answer, a convoluted process of electrocution combined with a flamethrower. 7.More scenes of them escaping Omega with Mr. McWayne and killing hundreds of guards. 8.More helicopter chases. 9.The various outlaw factions warming up before the fight and Jimmy Carter and Paper Chase guy arriving, with Jimmy explaining why he needs to fight. 10.Jimmy gives a speech about why the outlaws should join the New Way. 11.More of Persis being tortured. 12.The “Vector 7 Clear” guard being ambushed by the Geeks and the convoy forming. 13.The introduction of MegaWeapon. 14.More of the New Way’s infiltration to the Omega complex. 15.Pleasence and McWayne lecture each other before “We don’t have time for this.” 16.Persis shoots Pleasence about 10 more times, including in the head. 17.The DVD version doesn’t contain the abrupt music shift when Persis and Robert Ginty are staring at each other. 18.An alternate version of the scene of Pleasence leaving with Fred Williamson, with no obtrusive music and flashbacks to the Donald Clone getting shot. 19.A SHORTER version of Persis and Robert making out, thankfully. 20.Either the version used in the episode is playing at only 90% regular speed, or the version on Youtube, which I assume is off a DVD, is very slightly quicker. A little research shows that the movie’s framerate is slower than 24fps (closer to 22.5), and varies depending on the scene, at least the version used by the show. This may have been “fixed” on the official DVD for the film, resulting in the difference
Favorite riffs or quotes:
-Dr. F: Square Master. $49.95, or 3 payments of $29.95.
-Tom: It kind of loses its impact when it has three exclamation points after everything.
-Joel: Its a bottle of Royal Crown Cola. Crow: Its a Hoover upright.
-Crow: Motorcycle is closed-captioned for the hearing impaired. Joel: Humor impaired.
-Tom: How does the computer know they have bad mothers?
-Joel: You’d think in the future they’d have better graphics than Pong.
-Crow: Retsin?
-Crow: If that’s God, I’m quitting.
-Tom: I couldn’t beat Margaret Dumont.
-Joel: Every cough syrup... Tom: Cough syrup... J: ...mouthwash... T: ...mouthwash J: ...decongestant... T: ...decongestant... J: ...that you drink... T: ...drink... J: ...is red... T: ...red... J: ...or green. T: ...green, yeah. J: Remember my breath? T: Mmm-hmm. J: Remember how it used to be? T: Ooh, it stunk! J: I mean pew! T: P-U! J: And the dry,... T: Dry... J: ...hacking,... T: ...hacking... J: ...cough. T: ...cough J: ...Little globules, T: They were green, weren't they? J: Green and brown. T: And they stuck to ya. J: Well, no more. T: Uh-uh. J: Not with my... T: Mmmm? J:...Scope T: ...Scope J: ...and my... T: Yes? J: ...Robitussin. T: Oh, yes!
-Joel: Jimmy Carter, missing in action.
-Tom: Eat some malaise, sucker.
-Crow: There’s about 8 different movies being shot here.
-Joel: Skip Dionne Warwick and eat as pasty?
-Crow: I’d put bricks on the accelerators of cars and send them screamin’ down the highway for days on end.
-Crow: She’s got a Lady Hemingway!
-Crow: Pippo: The Marx brother nobody liked.
Overall:
By this point, BBI was firing at all cylinders. The cast is set. The formula is cemented. They were gearing up for a movie. But Joel’s departure is quickly approaching, and apparently was anticipated since late ‘92, even while his clashes with Jim became worse; thankfully BBI didn’t let these distractions and skirmishes diminish the quality of the show, which by now had matured into its final form, while Joel was the host, anyways.
I love everything about this episode. It is peak MST. Most of Season 5 is peak MST, but still. I love the stupid, disjointed film, which is the perfect fodder: dumb 80’s action with not much dialogue. I love the sketches (with the exception of the Steve Allen sketch), they’re all so smooth and fine-tuned, while being entertaining. For example, Servo’s Prologue speech would’ve been a wasted opportunity 3 Seasons ago, or frankly 3 seasons later. But there’s great energy to the puppetry from Kevin and Trace and it sells what should be a thin premise. Same with Square Master, Frank was BRINGING IT on that Shemp bit. Its a near perfect episode. The riffing is rich and full throughout the entire film, its simply great.
This is a Top 10, maybe Top 5 episode for me.
Score: A+
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Post by Diet Kolos on Mar 24, 2019 21:39:15 GMT -5
It’s my review, I’ll bite it where I want to.
Next episode!
502-Hercules
Movie:
The origin story to all those Hercules films from Season 4 (well, mostly just Hercules Unchained, but I digress…). Hercules is a fully-formed 45 year old hero who’s content to eat goats by the sea, kill monsters and rescue maidens for fun. He doesn’t question his destiny until he saves the princess Iole, upon which he immediately wants to give up his immortality.
The movie then crashes into a seemingly completely unrelated Golden Fleece story involving Jason because, I guess, Hercules isn’t interesting enough? Iole is his cousin or something, and her father had his killed…etc, etc. There’s also some other grab-bag elements of Greek mythology thrown in: Ulysses, the Argo, Amazons, you name it. A freaking dinosaur even shows up! At this point Hercules becomes a glorified bit player in his own movie and only gets to do the standard strong guy stuff like fight lions and pull down pillars, while the actual dramatic actors move the plot forward, such as it is.
Host Segments:
Prologue: Casual Day on the SOL. Segment 1: The Cellular Desk. Instant karma. Segment 2: New constellations for the ‘90s. Segment 3: Hamilton, Joe Frank & Reynolds. Segment 4: Crow’s one-man show “Give ‘em Hell, BLANK”. Segment 5: Tom and Crow discuss Amazons until a pair of modern Amazons show up.
Things that I noticed:
-Per the slate card, this episode was filmed (or edited) on 2/22/1993.
-This was the first episode shown of Season 5 on 7/18/93. It was originally scheduled to air on 6/5, with 501 following the next week, but was pushed back over a month. Presumably it had something to do with Joel’s departure.
-Dr. F is wearing another pair of glasses hanging around his neck. He’s also got a picture of himself on his desk.
-I gotta wonder how heavy that desk was.
-The packet of “bad karma” that Joel pours out has a hole in it and most of it spills out before he can open the packet.
-Joel is eating Capt’n Ron Cereal, which marshmallow Martin Shorts.
-They were a trio: Dan Hamilton, Joe Frank Carollo and Tommy Reynolds. Their other major hit was “Fallin’ in Love”.
-The Match Game sketch is a tour de force performance from Trace. Just to move the puppet around that much, change back and forth into 7 different characters, keep his timing, etc. Just remarkable.
-The monologue at the end of the Match Game sketch is a rough approximation of the soliloquy from Act 5, Scene 3 of “Richard III” and was probably written by resident Shakespeare nut Mike:
I shall despair. There is no creature loves me. And if I die no soul will pity me. And wherefore should they, since that I myself Find in myself no pity to myself.
-So how exactly did the Golden Fleece get to this mysterious, far-away island filled with hairy guys and dinosaurs, anyways?
-The Amazon’s T-shirts say: Amazons make better hotdish”.
-Those Amazons in Segment 5 are your standard stereotypical Minnesota moms. I have an aunt in the Twin Cities that looks, talks and sounds exactly like them.
Favorite riffs or quotes:
-Tom: I just sent my whole allowance to Sally Struthers. Joel: Oh, to sponsor a child. Tom: No, for her. I just feel sorry for her.
-Tom: That’s either Herc or Joe Piscapo.
-Crow: Hey! This is ancient Greece, they didn’t have ruins yet!
-Crow: Excuse me while I have a strange interlude.
-Iole: You think that people lie? Tom: No, never. Yes, always.
-Joel: Herc is a 90’s woman!
-Crow: Just think what they could’ve hit if they felt like it.
-Tom: Its the Bataan sex march!
-Tom: Wake up, you boozy old sex fiend, they’re gonna kill us all!
-Tom: How could he have written that after he died?
Overall:
I bit of a puzzler, this episode. Like I said about 501, this is peak MST. The writing is all there. Its humming along. But this episode is one of the rare, few mediocre episodes in the first half of the fifth season. And I think its solely the movie’s fault.
I said back in Season 4 that the Hercules episodes were some of my least favorite. They’re all the same. They all share the same plot beats. They all use the same brown color palette. They’re just sorta big, sweaty faux-epics that sit on your chest and lightly bash your head into the dirt with their over-earnest attempts at showing us what a mighty specter Hercules was. And this one is barely even about Hercules! Regardless, its just so…same-y and dull. And this is, like, the 5th Hercules film they’ve done and I’m just…done with it. I understand maybe they couldn’t get the rights in Season 4 and could later, but, much like another Season 5 dud, Radar Secret Service, they made the mistake of choosing a movie simply because they couldn’t get it previously. So that’s a big mark against the episode from the get-go.
The riffing is good-to-great, but mostly good. It starts strong, takes a big lull towards the middle, and picks back up once we meet the Amazons. This is Season 5, after all, so the quality is top-notch, there just isn’t a lot of material to work with, consistently.
The host segments are a bit of a mixed bag. The Prologue, Segments 2 and 3 are complete duds. The Prologue isn’t written, to be blunt. Segment 2 doesn’t go anywhere and doesn’t contain a joke. And Segment 3…well, I can tell they were trying to evoke the same thing they did with the Pina Colada Song sketch during Monster a-Go Go, but it simply isn’t as well written or thought out. The Inventions are fairly standard fare, but the cellular desk is a funny sight gag that had a lot of work put into making it. Segment 5 is good, but feels unbalanced. There was far too much of Joel and the bots talking about the Amazons, and not enough of the actual Amazons in the Hexfield. Segment 4, as I’ve already said, is the clear stand-out. A top 20 host segment. It has nothing to do with the film, but I can tell A LOT of effort, writing a prep went into it, and was probably written between Season 4 and 5 and was thrown in wherever it could fit. But god is it great.
So, yeah, a mixed bag. Its still a good episode, but its also an odd duck amid all the other great episodes in the first half of the season
Score: B
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Post by Diet Kolos on Mar 28, 2019 21:49:51 GMT -5
So about this review in Betty Lou’s handbag…
Next episode!
503-Swamp Diamonds w/Short: What To Do On A Date
Short:
Hopelessly inept 50’s teen Nick desperately wants to date the mousy Kay, but he’s such a mush-mouthed idiot, he can’t get out of his own way. Thankfully his smarmy friend Jeff and the omnipresent narrator are here to point the poor dumb clod in the right direction so he and Kay can go on more uncomfortable, clammy dates and awkward weenie roasts.
Movie:
Touch (née Mike) Connors is a big time oil man in New Orleans, who’s entertaining a gold digger during Mardi Gras. He gets tangled up in diamond heist plot involving escaped convict women (including Beverly Garland) and an undercover police officer there to take them down. They all endlessly traverse the swamp looking for hidden diamonds, occasionally killing someone or getting into pointless slap fights. It all looks horribly humid and miserable for everyone involved, which given how barebones and cheap Roger Corman productions were, it more than likely was.
Host Segments:
Prologue: Tom and Crow are fixated on an old Star Trek episode. Segment 1: Joel gets into his Shatner role. The U-View. The Andrew Lloyd Weber Grill. Segment 2: Tom wants to take Gypsy on a date. Segment 3: Tom asks a reluctant Gypsy on a date. Segment 4: Tom and Gypsy have an awkward date. Segment 5: Gypsy dumps Tom. Letters. More U-View.
Things that I noticed:
-The Star Trek episode in the Prologue and Segment 1 is “This Side of Paradise”. Elias Sandoval was just the name of the colony’s leader. I guess you had to improvise before the internet put all information at your fingertips.
-That episode of Star Trek is, bar none, THE single most referenced of any specific episode. I used to think Trace was the secret Trekkie because he would most often do the “I’m in love, Jim!” line, but even after he left it was referenced. So I’m pegging my bets on Kevin.
-Subtle but very effective visual effect with the U-View and the couch. Note how far apart Frank and Forrester are on the couch. Now note how long their arms would have to be to pass the remote back and forth.
-If you’ve ever been in the American South, particularly in a swampy area, watching this movie will give you a sticky, itchy uncomfortable feeling. As a Florida native, all the swamp scenes make me naturally uncomfortable for everyone because between the humidity and the mosquitoes, it must’ve been absolute hell. Especially if you have to wear little shorts.
-The “its raining diamonds” scene is one of the stupidest things I’ve ever seen in a movie.
-In Segment 4, Joel appears to be making a “Dagwood” sandwich.
-They make a few references to “The Gun in Betty Lou’s Handbag”, a now completely obscure 1992 film featuring a young Julianne Moore. It was panned by critics, made no money and is now totally forgotten. I only note it because of just how hopelessly dated the reference is, and probably was even back then.
-The letter in Segment 5 is addressed to “JOEL, TRACE, OR MICHAEL”. Sorry Kevin.
Favorite riffs or quotes:
-Crow: I need to know what NOT to do on a date!
-Crow: With each dial he comes closer and closer to the most humiliating moment of his life.
-Nick: Where’s my racket? Tom: I should spank myself.
-Joel: Boy, this is fun, what with the used lamp and the festoonery.
-Joel: Kay’s worked on the kill floor; she knows where to deliver the blow.
-Joel: You gotta watch out for those axis artists.
-Joel: Really festive colors for a Mardi Gras: brown and yellow.
-Joel: Its Pope Ed Asner!
-Crow: Your king commands you to get me another drink!
-Tom: Sir, what does this have to do with the whole Touch Connors thing?
-Tom: Its Lucy and Viv in the big house!
-Crow: The Kids in the Hall escaped from prison!
-Gypsy: Oh, the red one.
-Joel: Roger’s getting footage for another movie!
-Tom: Yes, its Delta Burke and Linda Bloodworth-Thomason, squaring off.
-Joel: But she LOVED that boat.
Overall:
Better than the prior episode. Corman’s incompetence really makes any episode shine. The short is brisk and goofy, always a good combo. The movie, though the endless swamp scenes do tend to drag, has enough lively performances and odd moments to supply ample riffing material. There is a bit of a lull in the riffing during some of those aforementioned endless swamp scenes, but it always bounces back strongly whenever Beverley and company stop to kill someone or get in yet another pointless slapping contest.
I liked the running story host segments of Tom and Gypsy’s date. The sketches were varied enough, and fully written enough to not get tedious, and to get a few chuckles out. Nothing too outstanding, but Segments 3 and 4 stand out. I rather enjoyed the Star Trek Prologue as well.
Again, better than 502, but still slightly below average for the first half of Season 5. This isn’t an episode I break out very often, or even think of, generally, but it’s a fairly strong episode on its own.
Score: B+
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Post by Diet Kolos on Mar 30, 2019 12:21:32 GMT -5
I’d post reviews faster, but I was all tied up. Meaning…I was all tied up.
Next episode!
504-Secret Agent Super Dragon
Movie:
A horrible mess of a movie. An Italian, French & German co-production, which may help explain some of the incongruities and incomprehensibles. But only just. Think Mighty Jack, but Europe-y.
In theory, this is a film about an American(?) super spy, Brian Cooper aka Super Dragon. He’s retired. But maybe not. He gets called into action because another spy died in some tiny college town in Michigan. Somehow this leads to international intrigue in Holland involving some kind of highly addictive drug, possibly disguised as gum, but maybe also as fine china, that makes you happy but also violent, maybe? There’s about 4 different female characters who all seem to have aliases and who may or may not be played by the same woman in different wigs. They’re all dubbed so its impossible to tell.
Its like having a particularly vivid Dutch-themed fever dream. You figure it out.
Host Segments:
Prologue: Tom and Crow build an annoying robot, Minsky. Segment 1: Virtual Comedy. Micro Golf. Segment 2: Tom writes a jazz combo. Segment 3: A reading for Crow’s “The Spy Who Hugged Me”. Segment 4: Spy puns. Segment 5: Forrester holds a Super Villian symposium.
Things that I noticed:
-Per the slate card, this episode was filmed (or edited) on 3/11/1993.
-Minsky the robot is actually “Tommy” the robot, a simple robot toy originally produced in the early 70s and mass produced into oblivion. The one featured on the show has only slight alterations, namely it was repainted and had little antenna stuck on its head. You can find them for cheap on eBay. And yes, that IS all that it does.
-Boy, Joel’s REALLY swinging that bat in Segment 1.
-Dr. Forrester comes back down into Deep 13 (in full 1920’s-era college garb) via the rarely used elevator, not mentioned or used directly since 210. The elevator door would eventually be removed and that space turned into a corridor.
-The virtual heckler is obviously Mike.
-Those virtual comedy gloves would, I believe, be later re-used as the Manipulator Arms from MST: The Movie.
-Tom completely butchers Chi-Chi Rodriguez’s name. Crow also mispronounces “Golgi”.
-Everyone in this movie looks, talks and moves like a Supermarionation film.
-A few times during the episode whenever the jazz music starts up, Tom quips “Twin Peaks”. It wasn’t until I actually watched Twin Peaks that I understood the reference, not only is it about the musical queue, its also about the secret agent with the slicked back hair.
-”You’ve been eating french fries with Morrie Moskovitch, haven’t you?” is another incredibly obscure line, this time referencing the novel “Portnoy’s Complaint”.
-In Segment 2, Crow has a barely visible, tiny goatee.
-Segment 2 was probably written by Trace, a self-proclaimed jazz nut, who, during his tenure at MST was in an amateur jazz band himself.
-In Segment 3, those are Joel’s real glasses.
-Also in Segment 3, Crow is silently mouthing along to the scriptreading.
-Tom mentions Ward E, the brainwashing facility from 305-Stranded In Space, the episode no one remembers.
Favorite riffs or quotes:
-Crow: Someone left a crayon burning.
-Tom: They’re gonna pan up and it’ll be John Cleese.
-Tom: Ross Perot, the early years.…It is Ross!
-Crow: Great fruit flavor burst right through his skull.
-Crow: Do not worship false eyelashes.
-Joel: Mennonites?
-Tom: They talk like a Speed Race cartoon.
-Crow: Nobody in this movie knows when to stop decorating.
-Crow: Ach mein Gott, he’s smooth!
-Joel: I’m gonna bend at the waist someday, I know it.
-Crow: Oh, that happens to everyone now and again.
-Joel: She looks like a white member of the Supremes.
-Joel: Hooray! I’m super clown!
-Joel: Conrad Pooh and his inflatable knees.
-Tom: Answer the chafing dish. That’s for me, I’ll take it on the pencil sharpener.
-Crow: Waitress, there’s a squeeze toy in my drink!
-Crow: Hey everybody! Let’s boink!
-Dr. F: Thank you, Frank. Frank: Whatever. D: Can I get some cream? F: No. D: Great.
Overall:
Another episode that doesn’t seem to get talked about a lot. Perhaps due to its proximity to a somewhat superior spy-themed episode in Agent Double 007, a few episodes from now. Which doesn’t mean that its bad, just that its not as coherent or consistently funny or memorable as that episode. In spite of being overshadowed, for what it is, this is a pretty good episode on its own.
The movie is totally incomprehensible. I’ve seen it at least a dozen times now and there’s still plot elements I don’t get and/or am discovering with each new viewing. Its not as impossible to understand what’s going on as in Mighty Jack or Castle of Fu Manchu, but its similar. This kind of confusion usually hinders the enjoyment of the episode and bogs down the riffing, but the riffs role with the punches and don’t try to understand the plot, so its not too bad. It perhaps only negatively affects the episode slightly. Again, as is to be expected for the era, the riffing is fast and constant. A high level of hilarity.
The host segments are varied and all show signs that they were completely, thoughtfully written, no low-effort quickies this episode. The only weak link being the Prologue, but its a set-up for a good payoff in Segment 1, so I can’t be too hard on it. Segment 5 is almost overwritten, and doesn’t elicit overt guffaws, but Trace plays it well. Segment 4 is perfectly fine. The standouts for me are Segments 2 & 3.
A fairly good episode. But, again, it gets overshadowed by other, better spy episodes.
Score: A-
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Post by Diet Kolos on Apr 1, 2019 21:38:29 GMT -5
My luberia makes it hard to review quickly.
Next episode!
505-The Magic Voyage of Sinbad
Movie:
Sinbad, a renowned sailor and amateur zither player, comes home to Copesand, a suspiciously Russian version of Arabia, after traveling the world and seeing many goofy sights. He doesn’t like how the local government/economy is functioning, so he decides to take it upon himself to personally upend it in the most convoluted way possible: by setting out on a voyage to steal a possibly mythical bird of happiness and bring it home. Therefor…uh…getting rid of poverty and indentured servitude? I guess?
One of King Neptune’s fishy daughters is impressed by Sinbad’s zither and agrees to help him fund his voyage via golden fishes. That is, fish literally made of gold. Now, why Sinbad couldn’t simply fix Copesand’s economy with his decent haul of said fishes and call it a day is open for debate, but as it happens he simply uses the funds for his pointless adventure and gives whatever’s left over to some of the poor so they can sustain themselves until he gets back with their promised bird.
Sinbad and his ragtag band of men set out and see all sorts of trippy sights, not the least of which is a horrifying human-sized bird with a woman’s head that looks like something straight out of a Cronenberg film. Having failed miserably and seen enough bizarre things to make any man want to stay on dry land for the rest of his life, Sinbad goes home and instead of giving the locals a mea culpa about how he mis-spent their gold fish funds, he makes up some fake lesson about how happiness is all around you and you don’t need any hideous bird-woman to tell you about it.
Host Segments:
Prologue: The S.O.L.tie Awards. Segment 1: Chinderwear. The Rat Pack Chess Set. Segment 2: Joel and the bots practice jestering. Segment 3: The city council discusses the Sinbad problem. Segment 4: Crow runs away. Segment 5: Joel introduces Channel Cat, the bots don’t understand that its just a puppet Letters. Frank meets Fisty.
Things that I noticed:
-Per the slate card, this episode was filmed (or edited) on 4/08/93.
-As was the trend back then at award shows, everyone in the Prologue is wearing a red AIDS ribbon.
-When Crow lists Magic Voice as a nominee, Cambot pans around the upper reaches of the bridge set.
-When Joel addresses the camera in the Prologue, you can see above the top of the bridge set.
-The Prologue and the beginning of Segment 1 are probably the Brains trying to find catharsis in their yearly tradition of being nominated for, and subsequently losing, a now-defunct CableACE Award.
-Between the invention intro and the end of Segment 1, Frank and Dr. F have swapped chinderwear.
-The film was originally called “Sadko” and was based on Russian folklore. Roger Corman got his mitts on it and redubbed everything, obscuring its Russian origins and awkwardly substituting the Sinbad mythos on top of the Sadko stuff. The Script Adaptor was an uncredited Francis Ford Coppola.
-The line “You look so gloomy…here, have some Prozac” was part of a Comedy Central “Pick the Wisecrack” contest. Essentially, viewers were given 3 choices of riffs for that scene, they could pick 1, write it on a postcard, and be randomly chosen as a winner. The winner got to appear in the bumpers of the 1993 Turkey Day Marathon, as well as $5,000 and a 60” big screen TV. It was won by a Ms. Susan Schneider of Jackson, NJ.
-In Segment 2, Crow’s jester stick with a mini-version of his head was last seen at the end of Monster a-Go Go when Joel dubbed him Sir Giggles Von Laughs-a-Lot.
-In Segment 3, Joel’s placard says “Rosnibon”.
-The underwater scene where Sinbad plays his zither for Neptune is one of the most visually interesting and straight up odd sequences to ever appear on the show. The terrifying bluebird of happiness is also equally the creepiest thing to ever appear on the show.
-In the background of Segment 5, note that Gypsy tries to eat the fish puppet at least twice. Great puppetry from Jim in this Segment.
Favorite riffs or quotes:
-Joel: That bear has Hammer pants on!
-Crow: No, no, I’m Dutch, I don’t want any furs. What am I doing here?
-Tom: Its 27 brides for 27 brothers!
-Joel: Help me! I don’t know how to stop!
-Crow: The 2 stages of Jackie Cooper.
-Crow: Sinbad, the resentful sailor.
-Narrator: Sadly, Sinbad wandered to the edge of the magic sea. Tom: And had a magic BM. -Crow: What fresh hell is this!
-Joel: I can’t tell if that’s a Magritte or just a hole in the wall.
-Crow: Nobody ever picks me for basketball.
-Crow: Made my own blender mayonnaise last night. Pretty…pretty creamy…
-Crow: I just thought we sold each other fish?
-Crow: Ah, yes, the Vikings of Sinbad.
-Joel: Oh, wow, I’m tripping.
-Sinbad: I’m not worried about it. Joel: My name’s in the title!
-Crow: Get the boy out of here!
-Joel: They also have a dog in there with Alan Alda’s head.
-Narrator: Down! Down! Down! Crow: Rock lobster!
-Joel: Sting is here!
-Tom: Kill me! Kill me!
-Tom: Now, quickly, follow me down the Fallopian tube.
Overall:
A wonderful, joyful episode. Like every other Russo-Finnish film featured on the show, this is a Top 25 episode. This one is probably in the Top 10. An amazing episode all around.
These kinds of films have a number of factors working in their favor. First, they’ve got a certain level of un-ironic visual goofyness automatically built in. It just comes naturally to these kinds films. Second, they have a somewhat shared heritage with the Brains. As big, square-headed Midwesterners with Scandinavian ancestry themselves, I figure that these films really spoke to them. And finally, they’re all dubbed and re-recorded and have big gaps without dialogue. The advantage there is obvious. It all combines into great episodes
Firstly the riffing. Possibly the best ever. Probably better than in Day the Earth Froze, but its close. An incredibly high volume of riffs. Constantly funny. Some great laugh out loud moments. And some great interplay with the movie, like when Joel and Crow fell asleep.
The host segments are all wonderful. The best of the bunch being the town council meeting, followed by the jestering. Crow running away is a fun concept that isn’t driven into the ground like it might’ve been in later seasons. The Mads’ invention is appropriately weird and creative. I have a special place in my heart for the channel cat, bit. There’s not a lot to it, but a combination of Joel’s dopey voice, Gypsy’s innocent fun followed by worry for the inanimate puppet, and Tom & Crow’s discussion about how its some sort of hologram; its delightful.
So, overall, a great episode. Can’t miss. A stone-cold classic. I can’t sing its praises enough.
Score: A+
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Post by Diet Kolos on Mar 17, 2023 20:34:30 GMT -5
Like Eegah, I’ve been locked away in a cave for what feels like centuries...
Next episode!
506-Eegah
Movie:
Out in the California desert, a waif-ish young woman, Roxy, runs down a hirsute caveman (Richard Kiel doing what he does best) with her tiny car. She immediately passes out like a fainting goat and when she comes to no one will believe her. Not her creepy, oily father (Arch Hall, Sr), his creepy, oily friends, nor her boyfriend (played by the creepy, oily and profoundly ugly Arch Hall, Jr).
Her dad goes on an expedition to find the caveman (who is called Eegah because of his guttural mumblings). He promptly falls down and breaks his collarbone upon seeing Eegah, who drags hims into his cave.
Roxy and Arch Jr go out looking for dad in Arch’s dune buggy. Roxy gets abducted by Eegah (and faints again, natch) and is also taken to the cave. It seems Eegah wants to pass on his giant, ugly genes to Roxy after striking out with dad (one has to assume, anyways).
Several awful, uncomfortable, disgusting scenes ensue. Arch Hall Jr sings! More than once! No, wait that was earlier in the film. But the stuff in the cave is just as bad. Roxy tries several, ever-more desperate ways to distract Eegah to keep him from slipping her his little-Eegah (the “alternative” as her dad so casually calls it). With her dad there looking on and providing terrible, nonchalant advice, its…really…not fun.
They escape the caveman’s advances and Eegah follows them into the city where he’s promptly crushed by the pressures of modern society.
Host Segments:
Prologue: Tom freezes Crow. Segment 1: The Porkarina. Frank gets his blood replaced with a radiator system. Segment 2: Personal versions of Hell. Segment 3: Turning Joel into Arch Hall Jr. Segment 4: Single-Parent homes on 60’s TV. Segment 5: The bots shower off the movie. Letters.
Things that I noticed:
-Per the slate card, this episode was filmed (or edited) on 4/26/93.
-The lighting in the Prologue is a bit darker than it always is for Joel’s tenure. It almost is a dark as the lighting in Season 6.
-Good puppetry this week with Crow. First falling apart and then barely being held together.
-What’s in Tom’s head in Segment 1? Looks like dolls’ heads. But why?
-Dr. F is gulping down protein powder with “FOR THE HARD GAINER!” written on it in Segment 1.
-Frank’s blood looks suspiciously like cranberry juice.
-Arch Hall, Sr, the director, made several movies in the ‘60s to act as star vehicles for his untalented son Arch Jr. Arch Sr. plays dad in this movie, and supposedly he was in a relationship with the actress that played his daughter, Roxy. The way the 2 play off each other in the movie makes this very believable. Its damned creepy.
-This movie was made around the same time as Manos, and the film quality looks similar. Though Eegah presumably had SOME budget vs Manos’…none. Eegah is just as creepy, but for different reasons.
-The shaving scene with Eegah is legitimately one of the more disgusting things ever shown on the show.
-The bottom of the machine in Segment 3 is a Singer typewriter.
-It doesn’t needs to be pointed out because it should be obvious, but Arch Hall Jr is STAGGERINGLY unappealing and untalented. My goodness.
-Another staggeringly unappealing and untalented filmmaker is in this movie in addition to the Halls Sr & Jr. Ray Dennis Steckler of Incredibly Strange Zombies fame plays the little twerp Eegah throws in the pool towards the end of the movie.
-The camera isn’t locked down in Segment 5 in Deep 13 and we get some rare Comedy Central-era camera movement.
Favorite riffs or quotes:
-Tom: Well Mr. Douglas, that there a genu-ine dirt birger. Crow: That’s not a dirt birger!
-Arch: Hi Roxy! Joel: Sorry about my face!
-Disembodied voice: Watch out for snakes! Tom: Who said that?
-Joel: Let’s not forget where we parked Supercar.
-Crow: He’s surrounded by adoring housewives.
-Tom: Like a Cabbage Patch Elvis.
-Crow: Joel, do you ever whizz out the desert?
-Tom: Stop saying “wee”! Nobody says “wee”!
-Joel: This guy went to the Torgo school of fondling.
-Crow: Switching on Arch hair! And it smells bad, too!
-Tom: He’s starting to look like Markie Post.
-Joel: She gets picked up so much she should have a handle.
Overall:
Oh… its been a long time since I wrote one of these…
I mentioned it above, but the movie reminds me quite a bit of Manos. It looks like Manos. The actors are about the same quality as in Manos (except for Richard Kiel of course). Its almost as creepy as Manos for all the wrong reasons. It isn’t, however, as soul-crushingly depressing as Manos ends up being. But it is…slimier. Every single person is covered in oil and I can just smell the unfiltered cigarettes and scotch. Plus Arch Sr’s canoodling with the lead actress that’s supposed to be his daughter… Its yucky. I don’t watch this episode often, but only because of the uncomfortable movie.
The riffing is very strong. Very, very strong. Late-Joel era has that breezy, effortless riffing style where they can go nearly a mile-a-minute and make it sound natural and off-the-cuff. It dips ever-so-slightly in the last quarter of the film before the pool party finale, but not by much.
The host segments are all okay-to-good. The standout being turning Joel into Arch Jr. Both the versions of hell and 60’s TV family sketches are well-written, if not actually totally funny. They’re the kind of character-driven sketches where we get a good sense of who Joel Robinson the character actually IS and how he relates to the bots that we never got too much with Mike. They’re cozy.
The episode on the whole is good. Top-tier good, really. But the score gets a little discounted by the unpleasant movie.
Score: A-
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Post by CrowTrobotfan92 on Mar 18, 2023 13:04:51 GMT -5
"EEGAH!" is one of my favorite Joel episodes, probably even my favorite overall. In spite of how lousy it is, I love the psychedelic 60s feel the movie has.... and seeing EEGAH die at the very end is always tough to sit through.
"I'm late for my ice dancing lesson..."
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Post by BoB3K on Mar 29, 2023 12:58:08 GMT -5
the movie reminds me quite a bit of Manos. It looks like Manos. The actors are about the same quality as in Manos (except for Richard Kiel of course). Its almost as creepy as Manos for all the wrong reasons. Leave a comment, this means you! Yes, and I never watch this ep, just like Manos, even though everyone rates them highly. I can't enjoy a riff if I hate the movie.
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Post by BoB3K on Apr 3, 2023 11:26:38 GMT -5
501-Warrior of the Lost World ... 20.Either the version used in the episode is playing at only 90% regular speed, or the version on Youtube, which I assume is off a DVD, is very slightly quicker. A little research shows that the movie’s framerate is slower than 24fps (closer to 22.5), and varies depending on the scene, at least the version used by the show. This may have been “fixed” on the official DVD for the film, resulting in the difference Hey maybe this contributes to why Paper Chase guy sounds so ridiculously on valium on his line deliveries...
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Post by Diet Kolos on Dec 9, 2023 22:57:04 GMT -5
I accuse my endless procastination. And my parents. I'm sure they're at fault somehow.
Next episode!
507-I Accuse My Parents w/Short: The Truck Farmer
Short:
Farming exists and supports the food supply of the nation. And power machinery like trucks and trains transport vegetables quickly to the poor saps that live in areas too cold to grow them themselves. Who knew?!
The answer is: Everyone. Everyone knew. This short is entirely pointless, outside its giddiness to show virgin forests being slashed and burned and vegetables being sprayed with toxic poisons.
Movie:
While standing trial, Jimmy accuses his parents. The end! Goodnight, folks.
No, no. The film starts in media res, so there's a lot of movie left.
Jimmy recounts to the judge his horrifying upbringing: His parents were more interested in their own lives than in his! The horror! And he does well in school! The shame!
Mom's a lush that wears goofy hats. And dad...is...kinda grumpy and would rather be playing cards, I guess? In any case, they throw kickass parties for middle-aged people.
Jimmy is ashamed of them, creates elaborate stories about them and...this somehow leads to a life of crime. Jimmy's position that his problems stem from his home-life is a little spurious, to say the least. The fact that Jimmy's rock-stupid never seems to occur to anyone in the movie.
Like every movie made prior to 1960, there's at least 3 pointless musical numbers sung by Jimmy's sort-of girlfriend, Kitty. There's also a big-faced chef that plays the role of Jimmy's Obi Wan.
Host Segments:
Prologue: Tom wants to be a real boy. Segment 1: Cake 'n Shake. The junk drawer organizer. Segment 2: The robots draw their ideal families. Segment 3: Gypsy sings Are You Happy in Your Work. Segment 4: Analyzing Jimmy's psyche. Segment 5: Tom and Crow want a hamburger sandwich. The Mads save Rodney from the cake.
Things that I noticed:
-Per the slate card, this episode was filmed (or edited) on 5/10/93. Not included on the Shout DVD release.
-The MST Hour wraps (surprisingly included in the Singles Collection DVD set from Shout) feature Jack Perkins calling his parents, getting enraged and throwing the phone at the end of Part 1. At the end of Part 2, he breaks down and is comforted by several stage-hands, then sneaks off and laughs while they're giving each other a group hug. The copyright is for 1994, not 1993 like the other MST Hour wraps. 507 was the final MST Hour episode made.
-The tube of paint in the Prologue is simply called "NUDE".
-The mirror in the Prologue is pointed towards a rarely seen area of the bridge during the Comedy Central era: underneath and just past the left window.
-The film is one of the oldest ever featured on the show: from 1944.
-Tom is holding crayons in both his hands in Segment 2, making his slinky arms extra slink-y.
-The "Liar!" chant Joel and the bots do throughout the movie may be a reference to a Three Dog Night song appropriately called "Liar".
-Jimmy's salary at the shoe store ($25/week) is equivalent to ~$22,725/year in today's money, or $10.92/hour.
-The check at the all-night Hee-Haw-themed restaurant that Jimmy picks up ($78.80), would be equal to $1,377.53 today. HOW in god's name did they spend that much there? It looks like for a party of 3 they ordered 4 Lobster Louis, 4 Filet Mignon & 3 bottles of champagne. Strange.
-Segment 3 is quite possibly the best ever featured on the show. Its executed perfectly. The little details put into it, the escalation... *chef's kiss* I can't imagine the amount of work and prep that went into it. Gypsy follows a route from behind the desk, around it and to stage left. Joel goes back behind the camera at least twice. There are multiple copies of the bots in different costumes. But its executed so well that it flows and you don't really notice it on first viewing. Perfect.
-Also in Segment 3, Joel's wearing his red smoking jacket at the end (and he's still got pencil marks all over his face).
-In Segment 4, some of the items on the mobile that aren't remarked on: "Pinewood Derby", "Braces"
-In Segment 5, the bots want a charbroiled hamburger sandwich with french-fried potatoes, a call-back to 203-Jungle Goddess.
-Tom and Crow's tank, the Ann Blyth, is a re-purposed Tank Top from 204-Catalina Caper.
Favorite riffs or quotes:
-Crow: How many times have you gone rooting through your junk drawer muttering to yourself "Where'd I put that gun?"
-Narrator: Most of us think these people were really free. Joel: But they were just stupid.
-Joel: These select few are making three cents a day.
-Crow: Stupid trees, god I hate 'em!
-Tom: Now this tomato's highly deformed, but cut off the eyes and its good eatin'.
-Tom: They laughed when I accused my parents and I killed them. Let's see if they'll be laughing now.
-Joel: PS: Say yes to Martini & Rossi on the rocks, say yes.
-Tom: Mirror mirror on the wall...can I make it to last call?
-Jimmy: That's all she thinks about. Tom: That and twist-off caps.
-Joel: Eleanor Roosevelt's PISSED!
-Crow: So Jimmy, do you like your kneecaps?
-Crow: Geez! Who ate all this stuff? Joel: Do you remember a fourth person sitting here?
-Tom: The talking corpse.
-Joel: I won the get-the-crap-kicked-out-of-you contest!
-Tom: I'm upstairs with the DT's! Could you get the yellow lizard out of the bathroom?
-Tom: You ever worked as a boy before?
-Tom: So, how about a little sugar for Happy Chef over here?
-Joel: I Accuse My Parents, brought to you by Boones Farm.
Overall:
This is one of the Top 5 episodes. Period. A perfect episode. A perfect movie. A perfect short. Perfect riffing. Perfect host segments. Its really that simple.
And it looks effortless. But this episode was the culmination of 5 years of slow-build to this moment. There is SO MUCH work put into every facet of this episode. For example, even the the host segments, which usually are the low-points of most episodes for me, are all exquisite. They look simple but there was a huge amount of effort put into all of them. The giant cake, the Jimmy-mobile, the aforementioned Gypsy song. The camera angles on the SOL bridge are all varied for every segment.
But the riffing this episode. My goodness. The riffing is on fire. Its endlessly quotable. And this isn't really a movie or a genre one thinks of as being in MST's wheelhouse. But they understand the movie's vibe and tone and complement it PERFECTLY.
Just...perfection. I can't say enough about it.
Score: A+
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Post by CrowTrobotfan92 on Dec 11, 2023 0:29:42 GMT -5
This and "EEGAH!" really pair nicely back to back, and are just two overall very nostalgic and funny episodes for me.
Ever since I was a kid I've wanted to eat that entire cake. This episode also gets me in the mood for a hamburger sammich and some french fried potatoes.
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Post by Diet Kolos on Dec 13, 2023 19:44:30 GMT -5
I'm Diet Kolos' brother, Neil Kolos.
Next episode!
508-Operation Double 007
Movie:
An Italian James Bond rip-off. And not content to just rip-off the tropes and plots of those movies like Super Dragon did, the producers went one step further and hired as many Bond-adjacent actors they could get their hands on.
Neil Connery is the "brother of our top agent". But his character's name is ALSO Neil Connery, not Neil Bond, so you can tell what kind of deep thought the producers went through here. Another example, Lois Maxwell (Moneypenny) is called...Ms. Maxwell. Real creatives behind this one, I tell ya.
Anywho, the bad guy from Thunderball (Adolfo Celi as Mr. Thayer aka Largo) kills a secret agent. That agent's girlfriend is currently being cared for by Neil, a plastic surgeon with hypnosis powers. Wait, what? Maybe the producers were more creative than I thought. He can also read lips. Nifty.
Neil gets roped into some light espionage by M and Moneypenny...I mean "Cunningham" and "Maxwell". Apparently the girlfriend was given secret info via hypnosis and only Neil can retrieve it. As is turns out, Thayer and his secret organization (which seems to consist mostly of scantily clad women) want to steal the world's gold reserves via blackmail or something. They need to steal an "atomic nucleus" first, and do so in the most flamboyant way.
Neil is on the trail and casually melts other people's minds and reads lips on the way. There are killer nuns, undercover beekeepers, blind rugmakers and grown men wearing pleather onesies while trying to look menacing. It eventually leads to a climactic(?) battle(?) beneath(?) a castle(?) where a be-pleather'd Thayer is planning to magnetize(?) everything(?). Lots of people get harpooned for some reason.
Host Segments:
Prologue: Joel's home movies. Segment 1: Lederhosen-hosen. Bobbin' Buzzard. Segment 2: I know... Segment 3: Sean and Neil: Parallel lives. Segment 4: Torgo shows back up with the Mads' Mr. Pibb. Segment 5: Dr. F sticks the bots to the wall.
Things that I noticed:
-Per the slate card, this episode was filmed (or edited) on 5/24/93.
-For legal reasons, the official release of the episode is called by the film's original name when released in US theaters "Operation Kid Brother".
-The Prologue hits close to home for me. About a decade ago I dug out a bunch of old VHS tapes of family vacations and events from the 50s/60s that had previously been silent 8mm home movies and was forced to watch them. They were exceptionally boring, also.
-One of the tapes in Segment 1 is title "Camp Fear".
-Frank's mark in Segment 1 is marked out with a very clear "F". He isn't standing on it.
-Famed film composer Ennio Morricone was the composer for the movie featured. Its not his best work. Even his Diabolik score blows this one out of the water.
-Early in the movie, Tom identifies a man in a fez as "Sukarno". This is a pretty darn obscure reference to the mononymous Sukarno, the first president of Indonesia from 1945-1967. He was known for wearing a fez.
-In Segment 2, Joel is wearing a shiny red robe. Not sure why though, his classic red smoking jacket would have sufficed.
-No mail in the last host segment.
Favorite riffs or quotes:
-Tom: Come over here and turn the music down!
-Tom: Hello, I'm Merv Griffin.
-Joel: I was just gonna press pause, but...nah.
-Crow: Now Michael Jackson's journey is complete.
-Joel: Here's the church, here's the steeple. Open the doors and go to sleep-le.
-Joel: Now, time for his catheter.
-Crow: Good god I'm ugly. Scared my own children out of the nursery today.
-Crow: They're playing the Penguin Song.
-Crow: Not in front of Sir Walter Raleigh!
-Crow: Norman! The calla lilies are raining hot lead!
-Joel: And Las Vegas was born!
-Maya: You read too many novels by Fleming. Crow: Jerry Fleming, Ian's brother.
-Crow: Hey, somebody punched the Foley guy.
-Tom: Prepare to meet Kali's brother, near hell.
Overall:
A step down. Perhaps because this episode is so close to the other Season 5 spy movie, Super Dragon, that it suffers in comparison. The movie itself feels like an episode Mike should be watching in the 2nd-half of Season 5.
The riffing starts very strong, but peters out significantly once charisma vacuum Neil Connery becomes the main focus of the movie. He just isn't interesting. Once the movie gets to the last 10-15 minutes the riffing becomes pretty sparse.
Host segments are a mixed bag. The only stand-out is Segment 2, which is very well put together and nicely layered. The Torgo appearance in Segment 4 feels very "We don't know what else to do". Frank's German turn is kind of funny, but not ha-ha funny. Segment 5 is amusing, and sticking the bots to the wall is a nice visual, and Dr. F's "I'm stuck to da wall!" is funny. But only just.
Well, they can't all be winners. One of the few "minor" episodes of Joel's half of Season 5. It isn't bad, but when there's so much better to choose from around it, the episode becomes a bit of an after-thought.
Score: B
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