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Post by yipestripe on Aug 11, 2009 23:52:10 GMT -5
What were the dirtiest jokes MST3K were able to slip through?
Village of the Giants:
When Tommy Kirk is trying to get the goo from the gang.
"Surrender the pink!"
Teen gang girl combing her hair in the theater. Beau Bridges: "Come on?" Hot Girl: "I'm coming." Mike Nelson: "No, you're combing."
This Island Earth:
Meechum holding stick shift, trying to get control of the plane.
Tom Servo: "Should we be seeing this?"
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Post by Fred Burroughs on Aug 12, 2009 0:30:25 GMT -5
The entire Starfighters episode? LOL
And while it's technically not a joke the whole dog's meat thing from The Deadly Bees was pretty bad.
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vadinho
Nanite
Grocer goodwill, plus volume, and selling displays
Posts: 37
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Post by vadinho on Aug 12, 2009 3:39:56 GMT -5
Hobgoblins
Club Scum MC: "The donkey mud wrestlers are to use the rear entrance" Crow: "Well your the expert on that."
Jack Frost
Ivan: "It's the first time I've sat on a shovel" Mike: "The flat part anyway..."
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Post by Fred Burroughs on Aug 12, 2009 4:29:13 GMT -5
Squirm:
"I just don't want you to be too disappointed if he doesn't come." Crow: "Mother that's private!"
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Post by spacedink on Aug 12, 2009 6:15:18 GMT -5
Viking Women and the Sea Serpent:
(The creepy girl gets mauled by hunting dogs)
Joel: They licked her to death!
Crow: I know...
Cave Dwellers:
Servo: He who reads these words of wit eats his little balls- oh, now that's immature even for the Dark Ages!
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Post by Bix Dugan on Aug 12, 2009 6:48:51 GMT -5
Season 8- Crow: "You can't beat, the effective insect-repellent...OFF!"
But Joel said it much more directly, in a KTMA episode.
Sidenote: I tried to identify each episode's "Dirtiest Line" in my Review Thread, Bix Dugan's Half-Assed Review.
But it's far from complete, because...you know...
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Post by godspedemperor on Aug 12, 2009 10:28:41 GMT -5
Just watched 'The Giant Gila Monster' again the other day, and caught one I hadn't noticed back when I first saw the ep. years ago on The Mystery Science Theater Hour:
Chase: "It's the Sheriff. If there's been a wreck I get a tow job out of it." Joel: "Oh wow... "
Also, there's a line from Tom when Chase picks up his mother and throws her over his shoulder: "Oedipus, you put me down. You'll poke your eyes out!"
And in a similar vein, one of my all-time favorite "adult" jokes is probably from "A Date With Your Family":
Narrator: "Brother seats Junior, then helps Mother into her chair, as he would his best girl." Mike: "The less said about this, the better."
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Post by Blackmarket Jazz on Aug 12, 2009 10:31:52 GMT -5
For me it's from Projected Man when the detective investigating Blanchards death says "Can I get on?" meaning can he continue with his investigation. To which Servo says "Well he's dead, but knock yourself out".
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Post by mrsphyllistorgo on Aug 12, 2009 11:50:45 GMT -5
From Agent for HARM:
Sexy girl: Are you coming, or do I swim alone? Crow: Yes and yes.
Still can't believe they got away with that one.
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Post by fathermushroom on Aug 12, 2009 14:29:18 GMT -5
From "The Slime People":
Mike: Look, it's the Three Spooges.
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Post by glowgirl004 on Aug 12, 2009 19:37:11 GMT -5
Servo refers to the suggestive stock footage of jets refueling in Santa Claus Conquers the Martians.
In Here Comes the Circus, Servo says about one of the acrobats "Yes, our Betty swings both ways!" and Joel scolds him.
Then as she slides down a rope, Crow says "This takes care of any unwanted hair in the bikini area!" and Joel scolds him too.
Stock footage is shown of a rocket taking off in The Creeping Terror, and Crow says in a girly voice "Ohhhhhhh Martin!"
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Post by jackbauer on Aug 12, 2009 23:19:35 GMT -5
From "Hired! Part Two":
"The first thing that Harry drilled into me..."
CROW: ...was Harry!
From "Why Study Industrial Arts?":
"...and I like the feel of a board moving smoothly against a saw..."
MIKE: [unsteady voice] Then I thrust the nail into the soft, yielding wood...
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Post by mrmeadows on Aug 13, 2009 1:48:57 GMT -5
Love the Harry joke from "Hired 2"!
Just watched "Girl in Lover's Lane" recently, and I had forgotten about the bit where Bix goes to the brothel and runs into the "are you waiting for a bus?" lady in the bathtub. After some "sudsy" dialogue between the two, Bix exits, turns to face the girl, and slowly closes two sliding doors directly in front of him, to which Servo adds "OOWWW!!!"
A very obvious, but hilarious dirty joke.
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Post by dph on Aug 13, 2009 7:56:22 GMT -5
I don't know if its really dirty, but there is a riff from "Why Study Industrial Arts".
CROW: "I can't get this thing back in my pants Earl!"
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Post by Tennis Hog on Aug 13, 2009 15:17:09 GMT -5
The entire refueling sequence from Starfighters. "Is this your first time?" "No, I've refueled LOTS of times before!" "It's okay, we can just cuddle". And then the host segment where Crow sticks his bowling pin up Tom's hoverskirt.
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