Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

[Afgncaap5]

It's probably no secret that I love it when people get annoyed by things. It's a wonderful time for me when I see someone who gets angry over things that, realistically, aren't a big deal. Meeting new friends who suffer road rage and shout an obscenity if the person in front of them takes more than a couple seconds to move past the stop sign are sure signs that God loves me.

And so with Thanksgiving tomorrow, I have to say thank you so much to all of you folks who become so unbelievably, unashamedly furious when Christmas decorations start popping up.

I swear, I don't even need to do anything. Most people I need to, I don't know, casually remind them about something in a sentence. But no, the people who want Christmas to wait its turn just go off without any provocation or notice. You don't even need to be near the Christmas part of stores or coincidentally listening to Christmas music on the radio: they just remind themselves of it, and they're already set to give me my rage-fueled joy.

So... to those of you who've never learned to just let the mysteries of holiday shopping go, or who for some reason never quite get as upset about all the St. Patrick's Day stuff that shows up a month in advance... well, thanks.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving guys.

And be sure to watch the Macy's parade until the end. Maybe there won't be a guy in a red suit and sleigh this year. You can always dream, right?

[Mitchell]

Are you on glue?

[Mighty Jack]

You annoy me Afgncaap5


...Your welcome

[Don Quixote]

Affy, I hope you get sodomized by a guy in a santa suit in the Newark bus stop men's room.

Because that would be hot.

[Mitchell]

And it IS what he asked for for Christmas.

[siamesesin]

Actually, I hope Affy ends up pulling a 14-hour shift at Wal-Mart in the electronics department.

[Don Quixote]

The turgid love story between Affy and the 400-pound lady with stringy hair and three teeth who works the cash register:

"Black Friday; Vibrant Heart"

Tonight at 8/7c on Lifetime: Television for Women.

[mummifiedstalin]

www.cracked.com/blog/the-4-christmas-articles-youll-see-internet/

#3

Your thread is irrelevant.

[siamesesin]

Nov 22, 2012 22:48:01 GMT -5 mummifiedstalin said:

www.cracked.com/blog/the-4-christmas-articles-youll-see-internet/

#3

Your thread is irrelevant.

Linking to DOB makes me a very happy panda.

[mummifiedstalin]

Nov 23, 2012 3:56:56 GMT -5 siamesesin said:

Nov 22, 2012 22:48:01 GMT -5 mummifiedstalin said:

www.cracked.com/blog/the-4-christmas-articles-youll-see-internet/

#3

Your thread is irrelevant.

Linking to DOB makes me a very happy panda.

And you make me so happy, I could Santa-spank a child!

[Don Quixote]

I just want to be flogged by the Krampus.

[Afgncaap5]

Nov 22, 2012 17:52:00 GMT -5 siamesesin said:

Actually, I hope Affy ends up pulling a 14-hour shift at Wal-Mart in the electronics department.

I worked retail for 5 years, almost always got the Christmas shift. I can't tell you how giddy it made me to see people actively buying gifts and decorations and feeling grumpy about it.

And mummi, buddy, #3 in that article only makes my thread irrelevant if I'm complaining about the complainers. I'm not. I'm trying to toss a bit of gasoline on their fire here, and within the first three replies I read, the very first three, was a victory. Anything more than that's just razzleberry dressing.

So, Happy Holidays all. I'll probably make my thread about this topic even earlier next year. Maybe Halloween.

[Mighty Jack]

My annoyance was my gift you. I'm glad you enjoyed it

But giddy about grumps? Your one weird mama jamma.

In truth, Since becoming a recluse, I no longer get annoyed by such things. I don't go out amongst the huddled crowds, I don't blacken my Fridays or decorate the Kringletree or wrap up gifts in colorful bow.

I shutter my windows, lock all my doors (fortified by Portcullis) and have dug a moat 'round my apartment and filled it with dangerous sharks and barracudas and fruit cake. I shop by mail.... and for foodstuffs, I venture out only in the wee hours of the AM. I creep in darkness amongst the back alleys -- under sewer lines bellow and gargoyled rooftops above. I am all alone in the dark....












I'm Batman.

[siamesesin]

So next year we should just ignore you, like we've all started to do with religion? SUITS ME!

[Afgncaap5]

You're welcome to try, Sia. It's a wonderful sentiment.

But I think we both know that there'll be at least one person who complains about it. ;-)