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Post by nightfalcawk on Jan 17, 2004 10:12:23 GMT -5
I just thought of a hilarious idea: Make the Architect and/ or the Oricle the Olson twins! I hate them so much!
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Torgo
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Post by Torgo on Jan 17, 2004 12:49:10 GMT -5
I just thought of a hilarious idea: Make the Architect and/ or the Oricle the Olson twins! I hate them so much! I would, but I already stated that Frank is playing the Architect. Sorry, man.
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Post by Buddhist Kitten on Jan 17, 2004 14:54:03 GMT -5
About the John Travolta in the Adam Sandler speech thingie. . . I think that happened to Travolta a couple of times, honestly. He is back at the source now, waiting for a role in the next Quentin Tarantino film, and/or hoping that Quentin hasn't forgotten about him.
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Torgo
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Post by Torgo on Jan 17, 2004 16:46:34 GMT -5
About the John Travolta in the Adam Sandler speech thingie. . . I think that happened to Travolta a couple of times, honestly. He is back at the source now, waiting for a role in the next Quentin Tarantino film, and/or hoping that Quentin hasn't forgotten about him. Tarantino forgot about him a long time ago. I can see John now, sitting next to the phone "Please Kill Bill Vol. 3! I'd be the perfect Bill!" RING RING! "Hello? Domestic Disturbance 2? I'LL TAKE IT!"
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Torgo
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Post by Torgo on Jan 18, 2004 1:11:15 GMT -5
(we cut back to home base where we see Morpheus watching football)
Morpheus: Damnit! That was a first down and you know it! Don't you dare give them the ball! That's it! I'm going down there and kicking your ass, ref!
(Morpheus gets up to leave, but runs into Tom and Crow as they enter)
Crow: Hey now! Any word from Joel and Mike?
Morpheus: Not yet.
Tom: Don't you think we should find out were they are? They've been gone for 3 hours.
Morpheus: Normally I'd send Trinity with a team after them but she hasn't left her quarters since they left.
(we cut to Trinity taking a shower)
Trinity: So dirty................THE DIRT WON'T COME OFF!.......Must get clean......................
(we cut back to Morpheus, Crow, and Tom)
Tom: Well, can't you send someone else?
Morpheus: What? These morons? I send my best team after you guys a few days ago and only one comes back.
(Mike and Joel appear in the doorway)
Morpheus: Finally! Is the damn war over?
Joel: No. Not really.
Morpheus: Damnit. What do I pay you people for?
Mike: Cool it. It's more complicated than that. Get Trinity. We've gotta discuss a few things.
(they all meet later sitting around a table)
Morpheus: Well, what's going on.
Mike: Well the Oricle told us...........
Morpheus: Yeah........what?
Mike: Just a sec...........I can't remember.
Trinity: Oh God. Why am I not surprised.
Mike: Hey! If you had to fight about 80 Adam Sandlers, you'd have trouble keeping track of things too.
Trinity: What? Adam Sandler? 80? What are you talking about?
Joel: We'll talk about that later. The Oricle told us that we have to rescue a Keymaker by the name of Lobo from the Great Vorelli. He'll give us a key to the Source.
Morpheus: So where is the Great Vorelli.
Joel: She didn't stick around long enough to tell us.
Trinity: That bitch. I've never trusted her.
Mike: What happened to "she is very wise."
Trinity: I have to tell all newcomers that. It's in the handbook. Truth is, we've had our share of "differences."
Morpheus: Trinity if you'd turn the Bitchiness down a notch, this is the only lead we have at this point...but where do we find this Great Vorelli.
Crow: You know, if I may interupt for a second, you may want to try a phone book...
(Crow slams a phonebook on the table and he and Tom flip through the pages)
Tom: Ah! Here it is! Vorelli!
Morpheus: In the immortal words of Al Bundy..."Let's rock."
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MSTie4Life
Anteater
NESPA!!! NESPA!!! NESPA!!!
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Post by MSTie4Life on Jan 18, 2004 14:38:07 GMT -5
A great story, man. I haven't seen either The Matrix Reloaded or The Matrix Revolutions, and I've only seen The Matrix once, and that was 4 years ago, so this story maybe even funnier once I see the other two Matrix films.
But still a funny story. I can't wait to see the rest.
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Torgo
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Post by Torgo on Jan 19, 2004 14:19:31 GMT -5
A great story, man. I haven't seen either The Matrix Reloaded or The Matrix Revolutions, and I've only seen The Matrix once, and that was 4 years ago, so this story maybe even funnier once I see the other two Matrix films. But still a funny story. I can't wait to see the rest. Well, there are several in jokes (the Orgy for example). So some things you would have to see the Matrix Reloaded and Revolutions to get. But I think my story stands on its own.
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Post by Buddhist Kitten on Jan 19, 2004 14:59:40 GMT -5
[glow=yellow,2,300]TYPE NEXT PART OF STORY PLEASE!!![/glow] Oh, I beg of you . . .
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Torgo
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Post by Torgo on Jan 19, 2004 15:12:01 GMT -5
[glow=yellow,2,300]TYPE NEXT PART OF STORY PLEASE!!![/glow] Oh, I beg of you . . . I would have done it last night, but I was watching a Carol Burnett and Friends marathon on TV Land. Addictive thing that Carol Burnett.... I'll get started on it.
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Post by Buddhist Kitten on Jan 19, 2004 15:47:15 GMT -5
I would have done it last night, but I was watching a Carol Burnett and Friends marathon on TV Land. Addictive thing that Carol Burnett.... I'll get started on it. That damned Carol Burnett! Her and her red hair. . . .her hilairious sketches. . . her CAROL BURNETT-INESS!
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Torgo
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Post by Torgo on Jan 19, 2004 16:10:07 GMT -5
(we cut to Joel, Mike, Morpheus, Trinity, Crow, and Tom entering a building. As they walk inside, they meen a ventriloquist's dummy)
Hugo: Hello. I am Hugo. You must be Joel, Mike, Morpheus, Trinity, Crow, and Tom Servo.
Mike: (with a puzzled look on his face) Yeah.
Hugo: The Great Vorelli has been expecting you.
Mike: He has?
Hugo: Yes, I shall lead you too him.
(Hugo leads them all to a table. Sitting at that table is the Great Vorelli. Standing behind him is Ator and Hercules)
Vorelli: Ah! My guests have arrived. Please sit.
(Mike sits down)
Morpheus: No thanks. We'll stand.
(Mike stands up as fast as he can, knocking his chair over in the process)
Vorelli: OK, suit yourself.
Trinity: How'd you know our names.
Vorelli: Because someone named Crow called and set up an appointment.
(Mike, Joel, Morpheus, Trinity, and Tom all stare at Crow)
Crow: What? You mean I wasn't supposed to do that?
Tom: You ruined the element of surprise, you lunkhead.
Crow: Well, how would we know he wasn't busy.
Joel: It's OK, Crow. We'll take it from here.
Mike: (to Vorelli) We're here for Lobo, the Keymaker.
Vorelli: You may have him...
Mike: We can? Cool. That was easy...
Vorelli: ...For a price.
Mike: Huh?
Vorelli: Give me $10. I have gambling debts.
Mike: Damn. Why does everyone want money from me today? All I have is $1.50.
Morpheus: OK, everyone. Empty your pockets. We need Lobo. I've got a 5.
Trinity: All I have is a quarter to get some gum on the way back.
Joel: Um...........37 cents.
Crow: Don't have pockets.
Tom: I found a penny on the way over here.
Mike: Is that ten bucks?
Trinity: Hell no. It's $7.13.
Mike: (to Vorelli) We've got $7.13. Comprimise?
Vorelli: Not enough. Sorry. Our business is done.
(Vorelli gets up and leaves. Ator and Hercules follow)
Mike: Wait. Can't we like give you this as a down payment? And we go back to base and get the rest? Or you could give us his arm or head or something until we have the money.
Vorelli: Good day, gentlemen. Hugo, show them the way out.
(Vorelli, Ator, and Hercules leave)
Trinity: Damnit.
Mike: We had to go buy toilet paper before we came.
Morpheus: Sorry! I was out!
Trinity: We need Lobo.
Tom: Thanks for stating the obvious, Trinity. We really couldn't remember why we are here.
Trinity: That's it.......
(Trinity pulls her gun and points it at Tom)
Tom: Just try it, A-Cup.
Trinity: Don't tempt me.
Hugo: You know, I could get you Lobo.
Mike: Huh? Hold it, Trinity. You can kill Servo later. How can you get us Lobo?
Hugo: I have access to him. But for a price...
Mike: Damn, not another one.
Hugo: It's not money.
Mike: (sighing) Good.
Hugo: You must give me.............................HAM!
Everyone else: Huh?
Hugo: Vorelli never gives me ham. Just because I'm a dummy. Biggot. I just want to try it just once.
Mike: Um, I don't think we have ham. Maybe we can go back to the store...
Tom: I got some ham.
Mike: What? Why?
Tom: I brought it in case I got hungry. It might have been a long drive.
Joel: Hungry? Tom, you're a robot, you don't eat.
Tom: Eh........better safe than sorry.
Mike: OK, Servo, give us the ham.
Tom: It's in my hoverskirt.
(Mike reaches into Tom's hoverskirt and pulls out some ham. Mike then gives it to Hugo who then eats it)
Hugo: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh...
Tom: Was it everything you expected?
Hugo: It had it's moments. C'mon. I'll now lead you to Lobo.
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Post by nightfalcawk on Jan 19, 2004 17:44:21 GMT -5
Good Job. Work in the Olson twins somehow.
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Torgo
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Post by Torgo on Jan 19, 2004 19:38:31 GMT -5
Good Job. Work in the Olson twins somehow. I thought about having them play "the Twins" just for you. But I decided to give that to two MSTed characters. If I have room I'll try.
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Torgo
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Post by Torgo on Jan 21, 2004 1:33:16 GMT -5
(they all walk down to a dungeon. Inside this dungeon sits Lobo)
Hugo: Oh Lobo!
Lobo: Time for go to bed?
Hugo: No, but these nice people want you to go with them. And bring your keys.
Lobo: Lobo like keys. They shiney.
Hugo: Yes Lobo. We know. C'mon... (Hugo leads Lobo to our heroes) Now get out of here before Vorelli...
Vorelli: HUGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Hugo: Sh*t.
(Vorelli runs into the dungeon with Ator and Hercules behind him)
Vorelli: Damnit Hugo. This is the third time this week. Why do you do this?
Hugo: I do it because of all those times you stuck your hand up my ass.
Vorelli: You're a dummy, Hugo!
Hugo: You're no Albert Einstein yourself.
Vorelli: Ugh............................You two (looks at Ator and Hurcules) Get Lobo.
Mike: Joel, get Lobo and the rest out of here.
Joel: C'mon. Let's go.
(Joel, Morpheus, Trinity, Lobo, Crow, and Tom all run away with Ator and Hurcules in pursuit)
Mike: Just you and me, Vorelli.
Vorelli: I think not. Do you really think I'd come without backup.
(into the dungeon pops Martin Sheen, Charlie Sheen, Joe Estevez, and Emilio Estevez)
Mike: Sh*t.
(the Estevez/Sheens charge. Emilio takes a swing at Mike, Mike ducks. Another swing, Mike blocks and punches sending Emilio into the wall. Martin comes up doing some ultra cool kung fu moves, Mike blocks and dodges each. He then kicks Martin's legs from under him and elbows him in the face knocking him out cold. Charlie punches Mike in the stomach and tries to swing at his face, but Mike being the ultra cool Action Hero that he is, dodges another one and smacks Charlie on the back of the head. That leaves Joe standing in front of him. They each stand still. Waiting for the other one to make his move. Mike gets impatiant and throws a punch. Joe dodges. Mike punches again and again. Joe dodges each one. Finally Joe punches and before Mike can react, he's on the floor. Joe stands above him, preparing to make his final move. Just then, Mike notices Hugo is standing right in front of him. Mike grabs Hugo's leg)
Hugo: Huh? The hell?
(Mike swings Hugo by the leg and Hugo slams into Joe's face knocking Joe out cold)
Mike: Too easy.
Hugo: I helped you get Lobo, you son of a bitch!
Mike: OK, Vorelli, your turn. Vorelli?
(Mike looks around. Vorelli is nowhere to be found. Mike then runs in the directon the rest went
Meanwhile Trinity's trying to hotwire a car)
Tom: Um, could you hurry? Those beefcakes arn't far behind us!
Trinity: I'd like to see you do it faster.
Joel: Um...................you know.
(Joel lowers the sun flap on the top of the car and down fall the keys)
Trinity: Where'd you learn that?
Joel: Terminator 2.
(They all get into the car)
Crow: Um, It's kinda cramped with six people in here.
Trinity: We could always leave your worthless ass behind.
(they drive off)
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Post by nightfalcawk on Jan 21, 2004 18:32:20 GMT -5
I love the "We could dump your useless ass." remark. That was great. Please continue.
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