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Post by siamesesin on Aug 13, 2011 8:33:33 GMT -5
That website is amazing, especially the resume.
I can email a comment to her now to warn her about getting a restraining order.
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Post by mummifiedstalin on Aug 13, 2011 13:57:22 GMT -5
She was a ch-host on Fox and Friends? That's a boner kill...
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Post by Don Quixote on Aug 13, 2011 16:52:59 GMT -5
Fox has tons of friends. What Fox doesn't know is that his dad was actually paying the parents to force their kids to hang out with Fox. Once Fox hits college and gets hazed to death using various TOTALLY NOT GAY phallic objects, his fraternity will be under investigation, and Fred Phelps will heartily endorse it. You wonder how I know this? Well, you see, I am actually...  Polyphemus! And I have been watching Coupon Suzie for many years. And it was only in smelling her garbage did I hear Fox's dad talk about it all from the open window! |
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Post by Crowfan on Aug 13, 2011 17:16:21 GMT -5
Damn, I really want some of whatever it is that DQ is on.
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Post by Mr. Atari on Aug 13, 2011 17:50:44 GMT -5
Under Special Skills on her résumé:
"Can Drive a Hearse & 5 speed. Read Teleprompters."
I can just imagine her sitting at her computer, trying to think of something to polish off her résumé:
"Hmm...well there was that one time I drove that hearse. Maybe that'll come in handy for that King Lear audition...Oh, and I can read when I have to."
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Post by mummifiedstalin on Aug 13, 2011 17:55:21 GMT -5
I like this:
Dialects: British, USA Southern.
So who CAN'T pretend to have a British or southern accent?
Oh, and she has a Passport. THANK flapjacksING GOD!
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Torgo
Moderator Emeritus 
-segment with Crow?
Posts: 15,420
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Post by Torgo on Aug 13, 2011 19:23:57 GMT -5
So who CAN'T pretend to have a British or southern accent? I can't. I speak American. Stephen Colbert tells me that is all that matters. |
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Post by Mitchell on Aug 13, 2011 23:17:18 GMT -5
All she needs on her resume is this:
SHANNON MOORE
Talents and Skills: --GIANT CANS |
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Torgo
Moderator Emeritus
-segment with Crow?
Posts: 15,420
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Post by Torgo on Aug 13, 2011 23:37:26 GMT -5
All she needs on her resume is this:
SHANNON MOORE
Talents and Skills: --GIANT CANS She tried that, but she forgot to use plural so it just said "giant can." But advertisors thought she'd be facing forward most of the time so they didn't care about her ass. The reply simply said "what about the boobs?" |
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Post by mummifiedstalin on Aug 13, 2011 23:55:42 GMT -5
Ah, the tyrrany of the plural.
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Post by siamesesin on Aug 14, 2011 15:56:04 GMT -5
Is that like the agony of the spell check?
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Post by Don Quixote on Aug 14, 2011 23:52:37 GMT -5
Every time I hear the words "Coupon Suzie", I immediately channel my inner 2nd grader, and reinterpret her name as "Poop on Suzie".
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Torgo
Moderator Emeritus
-segment with Crow?
Posts: 15,420
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Post by Torgo on Aug 15, 2011 0:37:51 GMT -5
Every time I hear the words "Coupon Suzie", I immediately channel my inner 2nd grader, and reinterpret her name as "Poop on Suzie". Don, your fetishes are wierd. How many times have you Googled "Two girls and one cup?" |
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Post by Mitchell on Aug 15, 2011 12:14:22 GMT -5
Every time I hear the words "Coupon Suzie", I immediately channel my inner 2nd grader, and reinterpret her name as "Poop on Suzie". Such things can be arranged |
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Post by siamesesin on Aug 15, 2011 12:23:43 GMT -5
Every time I hear the words "Coupon Suzie", I immediately channel my inner 2nd grader, and reinterpret her name as "Poop on Suzie". Such things can be arranged Pretty please, Mr. Mitchell? |
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