When Wholesome Holidays Go WRONG

[I Reject My Slave-name]

Ways to thank your kids for Fathers Day:

• Awwwwww. And I got you a one-way ticket to the Jesuits Fire Pit! Yes I did!
  
• Thankyou! In return, I helped combine some special holidays just for you: Easter and Christmas together!
  
• That's nice son. I'll try not to steal your job again, and then change stuff to make it seem like it happened the other way around.
  

Christmas:

• There's no Santa! It was me all along! In fact, there's no Jesus either and I don't think I'll tell you the next bit just yet.

Ignore me, I'm just trying something out here (as well as list code). Feel free to add to the thread tho'.

[XerxesTheCat]

Son (after opening package): "What the heck is this, Dad? It looks like doggie poop!"

Dad: "Yeeeaaaaahhh... it kinda is.... see I was running low on cash this year..."

OR...

This: www.snopes.com/holidays/christmas/stuck.asp