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Post by Bart Fargo on Jul 19, 2009 20:50:46 GMT -5
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Post by The Mad Plumber on Jul 19, 2009 21:30:01 GMT -5
I tried to make fun of this picture, but I got struck by lightning.
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Post by jkazoolien on Jul 20, 2009 13:08:02 GMT -5
HAVE I GOT A PLACE TO TELL YOU ABOUT...HEAVEN!
THERE ARE STRIPPER FACTORIES AND BEER VOLCANOES!
I GET TO HANG OUT WITH JESUS, ALLAH, JEHOVAH, VISHNU, AND BUDDHA ALL DAY, EVERY DAY!
THERE ARE CIGARETTES HERE, AND THEY'RE *GOOD* FOR YOU!
YOU'RE PROBABLY ASKING YOURSELF: HOW DO I GET THERE? IT'S SO EASY TO DO, I WANT TO TELL YOU MORE ABOUT IT BEFORE I TELL YOU HOW!
ALL YOUR EXES LIVE HERE AND THEY FORGIVE YOU AND YOU CAN HAVE "PARTIES" ON MATTRESS ISLAND!
THE ADVENTUROUS SOULS CAN SHOOT CHUPACABRAS. UNICORNS, AND REAGEN REPUBLICANS IN THE HUNTING LOUNGE!
HANG OUT AND ROCK WITH FRANK ZAPPA, JIMMY, JANIS, WALTER PAYTON, AND KURT VONNEGUT (WHO WE LET IN AS A JOKE).
*NOW* HOW BAD DO YOU WANT TO GET UP HERE?
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Post by Bart Fargo on Jul 22, 2009 16:04:57 GMT -5
That night, it started raining Oxyclean for forty days and forty nights.
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Post by p3ngu1n on Jul 23, 2009 19:02:08 GMT -5
Billy Mays finally had the really bad car accident this time even though the paramedics warned him about yelling while driving his car last time.
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Post by jkazoolien on Jul 24, 2009 3:13:27 GMT -5
BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE!
WHEN YOU GET TO HEAVEN, I, BILLY MAYS MYSELF, WILL PRESENT YOU WITH AN ETERNAL SUPPLY OF OXY-CLEAN!
CROAK WITHIN THE NEXT 10 MINUTES AND I'LL *DOUBLE* IT UP! YES, *TWO* ETERNITIES WORTH OF OXY-CLEAN FOR THE PRICE OF ONE SOUL!
BUT WAIT THERE'S *STILL* MORE!...
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