Post by chaoschampion13 on Aug 29, 2006 16:08:55 GMT -5
This is the first part of a riff script of a horrible Cartoon!Teen Titans fanfic called Redemption. You can find the original here, if you're interested: www.fanfiction.net/s/2072262/1/. Please read and review!
>Deadly Deals in the night
>It was a moonless cloudless night over Jump City.
Servo: ...meanwhile, Edward Bulwer-Lytton was eating his heart out...
>The stars shown bright in the night sky. Beneath the city in a dark room
>with one light swinging back and forth were two cold stone people
>each with a their own evil intents. Even the rats fled from them not
>wanting to be in the presences of these two.
>“Good evening, Lady Panther. I trust that your trip was no trouble at
>all?” said Slade with his one eye glaring at the shadow of a woman.
>“Cut the formalities, Slade! I didn’t come here for comfort!
Crow: <Lady Panther> I came here for the commitment-free sex.
>If I wanted that I’ve stayed in the Mediterranean.
Servo: She must be a REALLY good swimmer to have managed not to drown...
>I came here to do a job! Do you have the thing we discussed or not. If
>not I’ll leave, I don’t like wasting my time.”
Crow: Yeah, I’m with ya on that one.
>Said Lady Panther. She wore a black leather jumpsuit and a panther
>mask.
>He laughed his sinful laugh and picked up and dropped a large case on
>the rickety old wooden table. Click it open and spun it around.
>Inside a white silver particle beam gun laid gleaming in the dim light.
>She picked it up and examined it and smiled.
>“Its the very latest in particle beam technology. Palm print id.
Servo: What about the ego and superego?
>Laser aiming. The beam it self is invisible. Capable at being fired at any
>range.
Crow: <Slade> Actually hitting, on the other hand, is a whole ‘nother matter...
>It kills on contact. I think it fits your needs for this job.” He smiled at the
>hit women.
Joel: “Hit women”? Is that what you call Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, and Jennifer Lopez?
<Tom and Crow cringe in disgust>
>“You’ve done well Slade. Really well. I hate to see a weapon like this go
>to waste but it will do the job well. “Said Lady Panther
>“What to you mean it a shame to see that go to waste?
>I paid good money to get that gun. You better use it to the fullest of
>your abilities “he said angrily. Pounding his fist on the table he
>continued. “I didn’t higher you for no good reason.”
Servo: <singing> Can you take me hi-i-gher...<air guitar>to a place where blind men se-e-e?
>“I only use one per jobs.
Joel: Yeah, it’s not as though you have a second hand to carry another gun in...
>Never the same gun twice! I'd be too easy to track down.
Crow: Or maybe you’re just a neurotic bitch with too much free time on her hands.
>Now who’s my target.
Servo & Crow: Please let it be Forrester, PLEASE let it be Forrester...
>I really must know. And remember I only kill girls.
Servo & Crow: CRAP!!!
Joel: Well, it was worth a shot.
>They’re more fun than boys. I live for the thrill of the hunt. The adrenalin
>rush, the racing hearts and the blood. That my payment!” Lady Panther
>gloated.
>“Not who, whom. I want you to kill three girls at once. And I want you to
>do it in front of their boyfriends. When you accomplish that your reward
>will be a cruise through the Caribbean on a luxury cruise liner. First class >accommodations. I ‘m sure you’ll find everything to your liking.”
Crow: Or you COULD just pay her in cash...
>Her whole face lit up with enlightment. “I be elated to do this for you.
Crow: <Strong Bad> And I DEFINITELY no he be your boyfriend, Lady Panther!!
>Just show me the girls.” The light flickered off for a moment and three
>figures appeared to be standing. The gun went off and lights went on.
>“Impressive, really impressive. I think I see big things in your future.”
>He held his hand and she shook it and they laughed together.
>Three cardboard cut out of Starfire, Raven and Nakida were standing to
>their backs. Each girl was smiling but each one had a dime size hole
>through the heart.
Servo: They should go see their doctors immediately...
>“They’ll be dead before dawn!” giggled Lady Panther.
>And the lights went out with them laughing.
>If this was an episode I cut to the theme song.
Crow: And WE leave the theater, as the experiment is now over.
<Crow walks to the exit and tries to open the door, but it is still locked>
Crow: Unngh...this is definitely NOT shaping up to be our day...
>Deadly Deals in the night
>It was a moonless cloudless night over Jump City.
Servo: ...meanwhile, Edward Bulwer-Lytton was eating his heart out...
>The stars shown bright in the night sky. Beneath the city in a dark room
>with one light swinging back and forth were two cold stone people
>each with a their own evil intents. Even the rats fled from them not
>wanting to be in the presences of these two.
>“Good evening, Lady Panther. I trust that your trip was no trouble at
>all?” said Slade with his one eye glaring at the shadow of a woman.
>“Cut the formalities, Slade! I didn’t come here for comfort!
Crow: <Lady Panther> I came here for the commitment-free sex.
>If I wanted that I’ve stayed in the Mediterranean.
Servo: She must be a REALLY good swimmer to have managed not to drown...
>I came here to do a job! Do you have the thing we discussed or not. If
>not I’ll leave, I don’t like wasting my time.”
Crow: Yeah, I’m with ya on that one.
>Said Lady Panther. She wore a black leather jumpsuit and a panther
>mask.
>He laughed his sinful laugh and picked up and dropped a large case on
>the rickety old wooden table. Click it open and spun it around.
>Inside a white silver particle beam gun laid gleaming in the dim light.
>She picked it up and examined it and smiled.
>“Its the very latest in particle beam technology. Palm print id.
Servo: What about the ego and superego?
>Laser aiming. The beam it self is invisible. Capable at being fired at any
>range.
Crow: <Slade> Actually hitting, on the other hand, is a whole ‘nother matter...
>It kills on contact. I think it fits your needs for this job.” He smiled at the
>hit women.
Joel: “Hit women”? Is that what you call Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, and Jennifer Lopez?
<Tom and Crow cringe in disgust>
>“You’ve done well Slade. Really well. I hate to see a weapon like this go
>to waste but it will do the job well. “Said Lady Panther
>“What to you mean it a shame to see that go to waste?
>I paid good money to get that gun. You better use it to the fullest of
>your abilities “he said angrily. Pounding his fist on the table he
>continued. “I didn’t higher you for no good reason.”
Servo: <singing> Can you take me hi-i-gher...<air guitar>to a place where blind men se-e-e?
>“I only use one per jobs.
Joel: Yeah, it’s not as though you have a second hand to carry another gun in...
>Never the same gun twice! I'd be too easy to track down.
Crow: Or maybe you’re just a neurotic bitch with too much free time on her hands.
>Now who’s my target.
Servo & Crow: Please let it be Forrester, PLEASE let it be Forrester...
>I really must know. And remember I only kill girls.
Servo & Crow: CRAP!!!
Joel: Well, it was worth a shot.
>They’re more fun than boys. I live for the thrill of the hunt. The adrenalin
>rush, the racing hearts and the blood. That my payment!” Lady Panther
>gloated.
>“Not who, whom. I want you to kill three girls at once. And I want you to
>do it in front of their boyfriends. When you accomplish that your reward
>will be a cruise through the Caribbean on a luxury cruise liner. First class >accommodations. I ‘m sure you’ll find everything to your liking.”
Crow: Or you COULD just pay her in cash...
>Her whole face lit up with enlightment. “I be elated to do this for you.
Crow: <Strong Bad> And I DEFINITELY no he be your boyfriend, Lady Panther!!
>Just show me the girls.” The light flickered off for a moment and three
>figures appeared to be standing. The gun went off and lights went on.
>“Impressive, really impressive. I think I see big things in your future.”
>He held his hand and she shook it and they laughed together.
>Three cardboard cut out of Starfire, Raven and Nakida were standing to
>their backs. Each girl was smiling but each one had a dime size hole
>through the heart.
Servo: They should go see their doctors immediately...
>“They’ll be dead before dawn!” giggled Lady Panther.
>And the lights went out with them laughing.
>If this was an episode I cut to the theme song.
Crow: And WE leave the theater, as the experiment is now over.
<Crow walks to the exit and tries to open the door, but it is still locked>
Crow: Unngh...this is definitely NOT shaping up to be our day...