Xerxes the Cat's MST3K episodes reviews

[XerxesTheCat]

111- Moon Zero Two

Plot: A space salvage expert and his partner become involved with a group of criminals intent on hijacking a small asteroid made of sapphire and crashing it into the moon for later recovery. The only place that they can bring the asteroid down without drawing attention to themselves is a far side mining claim. But first they must dispose of the miner. Little known to them, however, is the fact that the miners sister has hired the same salvage team to help her locate her missing brother.

Hose Segemts:
Opening: Joel explains the premise again.
Invention Exchange: Teleporting food; Celebrety toothpaste containers
Segment #1: Servo presents a revue on people who have made it to the moon.... well, kinda.
Segemnt #2: J&TB discuss how games will probably evovle in the future.
Segment #3: Crow and Tom argue over who is the nicer-lookin chick in the film. Joel breaks up their fight by turing off the gravity.
Closing: A good thing and bad thing about the movie.

Memorable riffs:
Servo: "Look, he's beating the titles out of him!"

Joel: "Uh Houston I just spotted an animated cartoon on the service of the moon."

Joel: "Darn those spacecoons, they got into the garbage again!"

Crow: "They dress their stewerdeses like Nazis!"

Servo: "D cups as far as the eye can see."

Character in film: "Moon Flower!"
Joel (as Bartender): "Uh, the name's Bob if you don't mind."

Character in Movie: "Do you know the asteroids, Mr. Kemp?"
Servo: "Sure, I have an Atari."

Kemp: "It'll only be a 3-hour trip. I'll be back in time."
Crow: "That's what the Skipper said."

(Woman finds her brother as a skeleton)
Servo: "Woah. He's lost weight!"

Fav. riff:
Servo: "Did you ever think about renting your forehead out for advertising?"

Best segment: Segment #1 is very well-written.
Worst segment: Segment #2 is very lacking.

Comments:
-Hey, the Commercial Sign light is green!

-Rather questionable bit in the theater. During the scene where the astronaut removes his suit and gets into the shower, Joel actually stands up and pretends to peak into the shower!

-Great gag during the 1st segment. Joel is supposed to be impersonating JFK. To top that off, he's holding a photo of Marilyn Monroe!

-"MOONOPOLY"?!!!! LOL!

-The bit during segment 2 where Joel makes Crow and Tom do "Rock 'em Sock 'em" Robots may have inspired the short-lived Internet game that rhino.com created using the characters Crow and Servo.

-Interesting thing about the barfight scene in the film. Note that the female dancers continue dancing like nothing is going on. I don't know if this was intended by the director to be humorous, but it does make me chuckle a little.

-Um... Joel never gives Crow a ram chip!

Overall: This clearly isn't a well-liked Season 1 episode by the MST cast, and I can see why. The movie is actually okay to watch, but the riffing here is very so-so. Host segments are OK though.
Rating: **

The episode can be viewed here:
youtube.com/watch?v=qV9jA7CvlxE

[Film Scorpion]

I am seriously loving this thread. Keep up the great work, Xerxes!

You're coming up on a close personal favorite of mine, that is very dear to my heart for obvious reasons. Only two away.

So I have one request... when you get to 113 (The Black Scorpion), be as kind and generous as possible. May I suggest a 5 star rating would be in order? Just a suggestion.

And you know, not only is this a favorite of mine since I'm a Scorpio, and I legitimately love the film, in its unMSTed form, but strangest of coincidences... 113 is my birthday. November 3rd. It's also the street I live on, and the first three numbers of my zip code. Ain't that somethin'?

Anyway... just wanted to say I love your reviews. And I hope you give 113 much love.

[XerxesTheCat]

My rating system goes up to 4 stars: ****. But, i'll see what I think when I watch the epsiode. I'll keep you in mind.

112- Untamed Youth.

Plot: Two women are arrested for swimming in a pond naked (which could possibly mean the sheriff is very overtly strict, or very gay), and are sentenced to 30 days of hard labor. Stars Mamie Van Doren

Host Segments:
Opening: Servo needs to be fixed. Joel finds a magnetic tapeworm inside of him.
Invention Exchange: The Never-Light Pipe; Toung puppets.
Segment #1: A tribute to Greg Brady.
Segment #2: Crow recalls an incident when Gypsy's nervous system shut down. They look to see what's inside her brain. A picture of Richard basehart and some ram chips.
Segment #3: Gypsy is sick from producing so much cotton
Closing: J&TB discuss the goofy, nerdy guy in the movie. Then they read letters.

Memorable riffs:
Joel: "Thought you could hide behind the credits, eh?"

Character in movie: "Hi, Mitch! Whatch doin? Fishin?"
Crow: "No, just sexually harassing a few teens."

Crow: "I don't know what he expects from them, they're untamed!"

Crow: "Elvis has left the cotton field!"

Servo: "That phone doesn't look like it was made for a human head."

Guy in movie: "What's the matter Jenny?"
Crow: "I'm in prison!"

Mamie: "I thought Abe Lincoln had gotten rid of slavery."
Crow: "Yeah, he's right over there workin on it."

Servo: "That little punk hit me with a Nurf ball!"

Fav. Riff:
Servo: "Well, I pulled her teeth, is that what you wanted?"

Comments:
-Joel almost falls over as the first host segment starts.

-When one of the cotton-pickers drops a bag over Mamie's head, Servo shouts out something that SOUNDS like, "Eegah! Down!" He's probably saying, "Igor down", but it honests sounds like he's saying "Eegah." Is it possible that the movie Eegah was screened during season 1, but rejected until season 5? Unlikely I suppose, but who knows?

-During segment 2, Joel refers to Gypsy as a computer, rather than a robot. Mistake or intentional? You decide.

-Kevin Murphy makes a good observation about Segment 2 in the ACEG book. Why the [bleep] did that segment have to be a flashback in the first place?!

-Someone explain something to me. Is the guy in this movie DOING his own mother? I don't get it. It's very creepy.

-Gotta love Crow's Don Knott's impression.

-Gypsy makes her first appearence in the theater. She enters rather quickly after Joel calls her in. She must hang around near the theater often.

-Joel makes a weird comment in the closing segment. That Crow and Servo can't wear glasses because they don't have eyes to speak of. Um.... okay, Servo doesn't have any visible eyes, but Crow certainly does. The point of that comment is lost on me.

Best Segment: The cotton segment is okay, I guess.
Worst segment: The Greg Brady tribute is VERY BORING, and not entertaining in the least.

Overall: Another average episode, but still pretty good compared to earlier season 1 shows. It's also nice to finally see a movie that isn't science fiction. The movie is also okay on it's own, and the riffing just adds a little extra. So this is definetly one of the better season 1 shows.
Rating: ***

[mst3krom]

I am seriously loving this thread. Keep up the great work, Xerxes!

You're coming up on a close personal favorite of mine, that is very dear to my heart for obvious reasons. Only two away.

So I have one request... when you get to 113 (The Black Scorpion), be as kind and generous as possible. May I suggest a 5 star rating would be in order? Just a suggestion.

And you know, not only is this a favorite of mine since I'm a Scorpio, and I legitimately love the film, in its unMSTed form, but strangest of coincidences... 113 is my birthday. November 3rd. It's also the street I live on, and the first three numbers of my zip code. Ain't that somethin'?

Anyway... just wanted to say I love your reviews. And I hope you give 113 much love.

Whoa,...

Now I like that episode, not my favorite from the season (Robot Monster), but pretty good nontheless.
But this has to be the mother of all coincidences. Weird. Yeah, I guess you could call it that. Weird....

Oh, and Xerxes keep up the good work. Too bad you didn't get to see Slime People. Will you ever get back to it?

[XerxesTheCat]

I MIGHT get back to 108 after I do 104. It depends.

113- The Black Scorpion

Plot: Mexico becomes overrun with black scorpions. Oh the humanity.

Host Segments:
Opening: J&TB are partying like it's 1990(?).
Invention Exchange: The Mads have mutated themselves. The poor suckers. Joel presents new ideas for party whistles.
Segment 1: A tribute to Mexico.
Segment 2: While Servo and Crow discuss Joel's sleeping habits, Gypsy sneaks up on Servo dressed as a scorpion and eats him!
Segment 3: Crow and Tom do a tribute to the *AHEM* special effects in the film.
Ending: J&TB read letters. Crow receives an unusual letter.

Memorable riffs:
Joel: "Christmas trees!"
Servo: "Ten bucks a foot? Jeez."

Servo: "No more beans and tortillas for that kid!"

Crow: "Hey, that's the same place where they filmed Robot Monster!"

(cows mooing)
Crow: "Meanwhile in the shower..."

(cows continue mooing)
Joel: "Alright, everybody thank you. But, Oklahoma has been cast already."

Crow: "Jerry Mathers as the beavero."

Crow: "We have giant 40 foot pincers! Oh, no wait. That's the scorpion."

(shot of a demolished building)
Crow: "Heeeey your apartment is greeeeat!"

(shot of a train)
Crow: "Scorpion hobos!"

Joel: "Meanwhile in Ancient Greece, the same war raged on!"

Fav. riff:
(giant scorpions attack train)
Joel: "We here at AmTrack would like to apologize for any inconvinience this may have caused. This rarely ever happens."

Comments:
-Hilariously, The Mads accidently did the same invention that Joel did!
-During the opening shot of a destroyed/burnt building Joel says, "It's Universal studios!" Whoever came up with this riff, probably meant MGM studios.
-By this time Trace is starting to use the more "mature" tone for Crow's voice. But the "baby" tone still breaks through occasionally later on.
-Esoteric reference: Eddie Fitzgerald. I'm amazed someone at BBI knows him.
-About 3 minutes into the film, Joel, for whatever reason, crouches underneath the theater seat. He's probably turning the page script, but I don't know why he felt the need to bend over so far. Maybe he dropped something.
-I'm watching this episode off of Youtube, and the yo-yo that uploaded it stuck a fat "Flip4Mac" logo in the middle of the screen. It's not too obstructive, but the logo really kills Segment 1. I have virtually no idea what most of the subtitles are. So could anybody be a dear and post them for me. I'd like to be able to read them.
-A clip from this film was later used for the "Film Dub" game in an episode of the American "Whose Line is it Anyway?"
-I have no evidence to back me up, but I'm wondering if the footage of the giant scorpions came from "King Kong" (1933) as part of the infamous lost spider pit sequence. The stop-motion animation here looks REALLY old, even for this film. It looks very 30s-ish.
-In the movie, during the radio announcement for the deaths at the train station, the announcer uses the word, "apalling". Wow. Talk about an understatement.
-Somewhat dated riff: "Hey, it's the Disney Channel!" It's kinda dated, since the Disney Channel's logo doesn't look like thatanymore.
-After Crow says, "Let's get an instant replay of that", the footage of the scorpion grabbing the helicopter is replayed (for whatever reason). Obviously, Trace knew the footage was going to be replayed. More evidence that they've seen the movie before.
-Words fail to describe the letter Crow receives in the final segment. I wonder where the bloke who wrote all that is now? Actually, I probably shouldn't act negative, as that person may be on these boards, and I wouldn't even know it.

Best segment: Hard to say. All of the segments were pretty weak. I guess I'll pick the Invention Exchange. BTW, Dr. F looks cute as a skeleton.
Worst segment: Segment 3 seemed pointless.

Overall: This is a fine episode. I do like the riffing here, but the host segments are a bit disasterous.
Rating: **1/2

[mst3krom]

The scorpions were done by Willis O'Brien, who also did the stop-motion animation in King Kong. I don't know how correct this information is, but the worm that the scorpions killed and the spider that chases the little boy in the caverns, were supposedly used in the famous lost spider pit scene from King Kong and then re-used here, slightly altered off course.

Here's Peter Jackson's B&W recreation of that particular scene:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=PY0BGSi2T6U

[jjb3k]

xerxesthecat said:

-Esoteric reference: Eddie Fitzgerald. I'm amazed someone at BBI knows him.

Actually, I'm pretty sure that was a reference to Gordon Lightfoot's song "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald". I'm not sure if Eddie Fitzgerald would even have been obscure enough for BBI to know about in late 1989/early 1990.

[XerxesTheCat]

104- Women of the Prehistoric Planet

Plot: Astronauts crash onto a prehistoric world that.... really has no women to speak of. Until Linda is left behind with the planet's main guy "Tang", who is "Tangeriffic" I guess.

Host Segments:
Opening: Joel redecorates the SOL to look like a talk show stage, for if he ever gets back to Earth.
Invention Exchange: Clay and Lar's Flesh barn; Joel's toilet paper roll inside a bottle.
Segment 1: A strange satellite is found outside the ship. Joel, typically brings it in.
Segment 2: J&TB try to disarm the satellite, but that's not cheese! Oh, wait, wrong episode. Sorry.
Segment 3: The satellite transforms J&TB into Issac Asimov clones.
Enging: J&TB announce the winners to the "Name the Plant Guy" contest.

Memorable Riffs:
Servo: "We wish you a Merry Anders!"

Joel: He must hit his head on that beam a lot."
Servo: "Probably doesn't even feel it anymore."

Crow: "You're new here aren't you Elvis?"

Servo: "PIGS IN SPACE!!!!"

Servo: "Meanwhile at the Ocarina."

Joel: "No Thunderlizards were harmed during the making of this film."

Servo: "Spin & Marty to the rescue!"

(Tang picks up Linda from the river)
Servo: "Hey, it'll look great over the mantle!"

Tang: "I am Tang."
Servo: "I'm not just for breakfast anymore."

Linda: "Uh... Tang?"
Crow: "We're fresh out."

Joel: "You two disposable characters wait here."

Servo: "Come on, show her your red butt, like at the zoo."

Tang: "Linda like Tang?"
Crow: "Well, I like other kinds of beverages like Hi-C."

Captain: "I can't leave her here! Linda's my daughter!"
Crow: "Jeez, talk about deux ex machina!"

Crow (as Tang): "We got a planet to populate."
Joel (as Linda): "I'm already bored, Tang."

Fav. Riff:
Paul Gilbert: "There's on thing that puzzles me..."
Crow: "Fractions!"

Comments:
-Joel mentions "Tang" during the opening segment. What are the odds?

-Joel's wearing a ti-dye shirt underneath his jumpsuit!

-This film is THE ultimate candidate for MOST MISLEADING TITLE ever, not to mention most misleading poster. I originally thought this film's title was supposed to be called, "WOMAN of the prehistoric Planet", as that'd be more accurate, and "Women" was just a typo. But, nope, the studio purpously gave it "Women" to draw in audiences. Supposeldy foreign versions exist showing nude women swimming in lakes and ponds.

-We get the first mention of the nickname, "Johnny Longtorso."

-Segment 1 is sort of re-made into the Hubble segment from MST3K: The Movie.

-We hear Mike's voice for the first time in the episode. Ironically, his first line involves calling Joel a creep.

-We get the origin of the cry "Hi-Keeba!" from this film. I wonder if that's how it was written in the script, or if Paul Gilbert ad-libbed it.

-A rare moment in the series where either of the robots actually do something... well "robotic". Crow scans the satellite instructions with his eyes so Joel understands them. Usually the Bots are very human-like.

-Unintentionally funny moment in the film. Linda asks where her clothes are, and Tang simply says that they're wet. Never actually explaining where they are. The moment where Linda realizes Tang undressed her while she was unconscious is just as humorous.

-When Linda says, "I must go back to the ship that brought me here", watch the actress in the iceblock behind her. She's moving around even though she's supposed to be frozen. Whoops.

-The "crossing the log" scene ranks IMO one of the DUMBEST scenes in any MST'ed film!

-Dirty-sounding riff: "I'm gonna go spank myself." - Joel as the monkey.

-The "shocking" twist ending to this film wouldn't be so bad, if not for the fact that the final shot of Earth, is clearly a "modern-day" shot of Earth. Remember Pangea?

-Servo's head falls off during the final segment. Josh: "That was my skull!"

-Not only is this the final season 1 episode produced, it's the last episode with castmember Josh Weinstein. So starting with season 2, Tom Servo gets a new voice, and Dr. Forrester gets a new assistant. Farewell, Josh! See you in twenty... er... nineteen... er... whatever.

-You're probably wondering why this episode has the number "104", if it's the last season 1 episode. Kevin Murphy explains in the ACEG book, that Comedy Central couldn't get the rights to this movie in time to shoot, so The Brains just skipped this episode and went ahead to shoot 105.
Although, one has to wonder why The Brains didn't just re-fix the numbering system? Nobody at BBI probably remembers, but here's my own theory:
Back then production numbers were only used for in-house reference only. Mainly so networks would know what order the episodes are supposed to go in, when airing them in syndication. The brains probably figured that since there was no "arc" in any of the episodes, and most fans had the numbering systems memorized anyway, it seemed a waste to refigure everything, so the number was lift the way it is. Although The Brains plumb forgot about the letter reading segment, which makes references to shows 105, 109, and 110!

Best segment: All of the segments have to do with the killer satellite. I probably like Segment 2 the best.
Worst segment: I dunno. Segmet 1 is kinda stupid.

Overall: A really good lead in for Season 2. This one of the best season 1 shows. Riffing is very tight, and segments are enjoyable. I like this episode a lot. But, as you might imagine, the episode still doesn't hold a candle to what will be in store for us next year.
Rating: ***

[XerxesTheCat]

As Dean B. once said about Whose Line is it Anyway?, "Hey, that first season wasn't so bad! They made another one, didn't they? And it was one of the better ones too!"

I think we can safely say that this goes for MST3K as well.

201- Rocketship X-M

Plot: All about a crew on a ship called "Expedition Moon". That's what X-M stands for. I though Expedition started with an 'E'?

Host Segments:
Opening: Joel presents the new look for the SOL. Crow has a toothache, and Joel is getting ready to install Servo with a brand new voice.
Invention Exchange: Joel's BGC19; Frank presents his own original invention, the BGC1- wait...
Segment 1: A tribute to the astronauts of X-M.
Segment 2: Joel presents objects that are funny or not funny when floating.
Segment 3: J&TB discuss philosiphies. Valeria randomly appears in the Hexfield Viewscreen.
Ending: J&TB read a letter.

Memorable riffs:
Crow: "Assembly today? That means no class!"

Scientist: "I must make something clear..."
Servo: "I'm wearing a bra."

Scientist: "Today you're all here to witness an important event..."
Joel: "My outing!"

Servo: "Dad, stop! We lost the camper!"

*classic music plays on the soundtrack*
Servo: "Oh now who turned on the radio?"

Servo: "Uh-oh! He's waking up! Quick, tell that story again!"

Character in movie: "816!"
Servo: "You sunk my battleship!"

(scientist randomly touches the others' shoulders)
Joel: "Duck... duck... goose!"

(shot of Mars)
Joel: "Looks like Art Carney."

Crow (as Lloyd Bridges): "You know once I was on a Tilt-a-Whirl.."
Joel and Servo: "SHUT UP!!!"

(scientist holds up spacesuit)
Scientist: "I've been itching to get into one of these."
Servo: "My grandmother's skin."

Joel: "Who brought the sandwiches?"
Crow: "Uh... sandwiches?"

Crow: "Alright, if we don't find a bush or a tree in the next two miles, well, just go anywhere."

(astronauts stand over a cliff)
*J&TB make spitting sounds*

Crow: "Oh, shut up! Ever since we left, all we've heard out of you is Texas this and Texas that. We'll listen Bob, I've been to Texas and it's not all that great!"

Servo: "Hey they're shooting 2001 down there!"

Servo: "Do they have rocks that big in Texas, Bill?"

Joel: "You move the head, I'll do the voice!"

Joel: "Well, at least he hasn't been hit by a rock yet."
(Moon Man throws heavey rock on astronaut)
Servo: "Good shot!"

Crow: "If I held you any tighter I'd be in back of you."

Fav. Riff:
Character in Movie: "Come in X-M!"
Crow: "HHHHHEEEEEEEEELLLLLPPPPP!!!!!"
Character: "Repeat that again, Dr. Van Horn."
Crow: "I said HEEEEEEELLLLLLLLPPPP! H-E-L-P! Pronounced HEEEEELLLLLLLPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!"

Comments:
-Hoo boy. Lots of debuts here. The first time we see the "Turn down your lights" graphic, first time we see the Joel-era opening theme that most fans are familiar with, first time we see the more detailed SOL set, first episode with Kevin Murphy as Tom Servo (also his debut role on the show), first episode with the mole people, and last but not least, our introduction to Dr. F's most popular assistant, Frank played by Frank Conniff.

-Joel's wearing a green jumpsuit as opposed to the normal red one.

-Kevin here uses a much deeper voice for Servo (even moreso than Josh used). Kevin's Servo voice would become less deep gradually before settling on a "finalized" voice in Season 4.

-Frank simply holds up a milk carton with Larry's face on it, and says that "He's missing." On that note, we never actually do find out what happened to him. Although Larry is mentioned once in a later Season 3 episode.

-At one point Joel riffs, "Goodnight Mike Nelson of Seahunt fame." Mike Nelson was a character that Lloyd Bridges played in Seahunt, although I'm sure some MSTies who aren't aware of that movie must think Joel is referring to Mike Nelson, MST3K's head writer and latter show host.

-The Sebastian Cabot reference in segment 2 always cracks me up to no end. Apologies to Mr. Cabot.

-The font for the MST Info Club text has changed, although it's still yellow.

-Mike Nelson is the first person to appear in the Hexfield Viewscreen. He's playing the role of Valeria from the movie "Robot Holcaust."

-Joel asks why Dr. F doesn't just show them 'Marooned'. Dr. F replies, "We couldn't get it." They actually do get it in season 4.

Best segment: Valeria was my favorite character in "Robot Holocaust". So with an unbiased mind, I'm going to pick Segment 3.
Worst Segment: I couldn't really get into Segment 1.

Overall: Wow. Just.... wow. It's amazing how quickly they turned themsleves around from the end of season 1 to, the start of season 2. It's a massive difference in terms of laughter and jokes. I had a hell of a time deciding which ones I liked best, because they're all so good. One of the best episodes of the whole series. This is the first time in which I honestly have to give an episode the full four stars.
Rating: ****

[XerxesTheCat]

202- Sidehackers

Plot: Sidehacking. One gang gets snubbed by a mechanic and his girlfriend. So the leader kills the girl, and the mechanic plots revenge. Very little Sidehacking going on.

Host Segments:
Opening: The Bots have been bathed.
Invention Exchange: Joel's pet slinky, and Dr. F's slinky body.
Segment 1: Joel performs a song about Sidehacking
Segment 2: J&TB do their own sports commentary on the sidehacking race sequence from the film.
Segment 3: J&TB discuss Rommel. All the Bots can think about is how he killed Rita, when suddenly JC (Mike Nelson) appears in the Hexfield.
Ending: Joel sings, "Only Love Pads the Film." Then, Joel reads a letter.

Memorable Riffs:
Rommel: "Sure I swing."
Crow: "Both ways?"

Servo: "And this is my country estate. I also keep a trailer home in the city."

Servo: "Wait, that's for the drug test! No!"

Rommel: "You ever read the Bible?"
Crow: "No, but I saw the movie."

Rommel (referring to Rita): "How did I know she was gonna die?"
Servo: "Uh, because you killed her."

Servo: "Hey, look! He's sportin' a woody!"

Servo: "Oh, don't grab his gun. No guns."

Fav. Riff:
(JC at the beach thinking about now-deceased Rita)
Crow: "We used to come here and club seals together."

Comments:
-WHY are Crow and Tom so excited about watching the movie? What, does Joel have them set on masochist mode today?

-This is the only time on the show where Cambot does his own "riff" of some sort, where he does an ESPN mock-up chart.

-When I watch segment 2 I can't help but wonder if maybe the Brains went overboard with the riffs during the Sidehacker race, and they decided to write segment 2 to include those riffs.

-In the ACEG book, Mike mentions that they didn't watch the whole film when previewing it. When it came time to write the riffs, all the writers were caught off-guard by a graphic rape scene between Rommel's gang and JC's girlfriend Rita. The scene was cut, and from that point onward, when previewing a film they would watch the film from start to finish.

-This is the 2nd time that Crow has mentioned that a ship is approaching the SOL, and Joel thinks he's making a joke. Was this a planned running gag that the Brains thought of, that eventually was abandoned?

Best segment: The Sidehacking song!
Worst segment: Segment 2 is monotonous, and seems to drag on forever.

Overall: Kind of a letdown compared to the previous episode, but still a good episode. I'd call it average.
Rating: ***1/2

[mst3krom]

Some fans consider Sidehackers the true turning point of the series after Season 1, but I strongly disagree. No amount of good riffing could have saved that turd of movie and I wonder why didn't the Brains just choose another movie if this one was so repulsive. The previous episode, Rocketship X-M, was way more funnier than this one.

[XerxesTheCat]

203- Jungle Goddess (with short: The phantom Creeps)

Movie Plot: Looking for an heiress in Africa, two white hunters find her reigning as a jungle queen, but the natives are restless.

Short Plot: Bela Lugosi plays a mad scientist with some robot.

Host Segments:
Opening: J&TB are playing hide and seek with the universe.
Invention Exchange: Joel’s Radio Saw; Dr. F’s Head sax.
Segment 1: J&TB promote Bela Lugosi products.
Segment 2: Joel shows different iris techniques for film. Servo: “So we’ll just sit here and act as the brunt of your little visual joke?”
Segment 3: Two white demons (Mike Nelson and Jim Mallon) appear in the Hexfield.
Closing: J&TB put on “My White Goddess.”

Memorable Riffs from short:
Crow: “Oh, what’s the big deal? It’s big metal Richard Kiel!”

Servo: “Hey, that’s a pretty good Patrick Swayze!”

Joel: “I’m dead now. Don’t hitchhike.”

Memorable riffs from Movie:
Servo: “Hey, these Viewmasters really bring nature to life!”

Crow: “Guano hit fan!”

Fav. Riff:
Joel (as snake): “Hi, I’m Satan! Enjoy the film!”

Comments:
-Servo extends his neck muscle in the opening segment. It’s rare that we see him do that.

-Dr. F doesn’t announce the film! He does introduce the short though.

-Big, honking error in the film. It takes place in Africa, but there’s a cougar! WTF?

-Segment 3, I think contains what may be the first mentioning of “Widowmakers”.

-This is the episode where Joel refers to Crow as “Art Crow” (a reference to Art Carney). Later, a young viewer would see this and assume that Crow’s name was “Art”, and actually sent in a fan letter with a drawing of Crow labeled “Art.”

Best Segment: The White Demons segment is totally absurd, and funny.
Worst Segment: The Infomercial segment is awkward and goes on far too long.

Overall/ Rating: This is an unfortunately dull episode, featuring a very dull movie with an uncomfortably racist tone to it. Riffs are a little sparse here, and the host segments are kind of duds. **1/2

[brandonakaxerxes]

This is "XerxesTheCat", but under a new name. I am still continuing my reviews, so don't worry. Here's 204.

204- Catalina Caper.

Plot: Some sailor guy tries to steal some scroll. meanwhile beach dances and musical numbers pad out the rest of the film. Running gag of some dorky cop trying to spy on all the characters. Stars Tommy Kirk, Del Moore, Robert Donner, and LITTLE RICHARD!

Host Segments:
Opening: The Bots send their prayers to many other robots including R2-D2 and RoboCop.
Invention Exchange: Tank Tops, Tickle Bazooka
Segment 1: Joel explains the 60s.
Segemnt 2: Servo sings, "Creepy Girl".
Segment 3: Frank's tupperware party.
Closing: Joel explains the movie.

Memorable riffs:
Joel: "Jacques Cousteau meets the Pink Panther."

Joel: "Heyy... nice railing."

Guy: "Let's dig Little Richard, really turn it on!"
Crow: "Little Richard? I hate impressionists!"
Servo: "No, you're thinking of Rich Little."

(guy dances wildly)
Joel: "Is there a history of epilepsy in your family?"

Crow: "Little Richard, the only genuine talent in this film."

Scuba Diver: "Bottoms up!"
Crow: "He's always saying that. We don't know why."

Crow: "Wet Side Story!"

Crow: "Hey, she lost the bone in her neck!"

Crow: "He's kinda caught between a rock and a hard pl--"
*Servo coughs*

Del: "They should be coming up soon."
Crow: "What, our lunch?"

Fav. Riff:
Servo (singing): "There's a concept, it's called harmonyyyyyy."

Comments:
-Katrina, aka, Creepy Girly, kinda makes me think she could pass off as a young Rhea Perlman.

-I'm watching this episode on a DVD-ROM, and with the screen enlarged, I just now noticed that the shadowrama is cut off on the right side of the screen. It looks quite jarring.

-The way Del Moore speaks, I can't help but think of Paul Lynde.

-Throughout this episode, Crow keeps trying to throw in the "By this time my lungs were aching for air." A throwback to 201- Rocketship XM. A reference to Lloyd Bridges.

-This movie is billed as a comedy, but to be honest, there really aren't any funny bits in it. The only intentionally funny moments are Robert Donner's scenes. The rest, just seem like regular beach scenes.

-Depending on whenever that bozo sent Kevin that "I HATE TOM SERVO'S NEW VOICE!" banner, I'm sure he had to have felt like eating crow (bird crow, not robot Crow) after hearing the Creepy Girl song. Now Josh was great and all, and I like his Servo voice, but there's just no way he could have pulled off the Creepy Girl song the way Kevin does.

-About 56 minutes in, Crow asks what happend to the treasure hunt, and Joel informs him that the movie's only "half over" and maybe they'll get back to it. Actually, by this time the movie's about a third of the way over.

-Carol Conners is the worst lip-syncher I've ever seen in my life.

-What kind of name is "Fingers O'Toole"? Really.

Best Segment: "Creepy Giiiiirl. Won't you be mi-i-ine? I'll give you scrolls and fish and tinkertoys, and wi-i-ii-ne!"
Worst segment: Segment 3 is REALLLLLLL-LLLLLY baaaaaaad. One of only a few MST3K segments that just isn't worth your time watching.

Overall: A pretty good episode, with a fairly watchable movie. Good riffing, and some nice host segments. Rating: ***

[brandonakaxerxes]

205- Rocket Attack USA. W/ short: The Phantom Creeps

Plot: Guy spy sneaks into Soviet Union with aid of woman spy, but despite their efforts, New York City is nuked.

Host Segments:
Opening: Tom gets "haircut."
Invention exchange: Candy adding machine, water-polo foosball.
Host segment 1: The Charlie McCarthey hearings.
Host segment 2: Nuclear quiz show.
Host segment 3: Joel's Russian counterpart on the Hexfield.
End: J&TB upset about the movie, letter, the Mads are happy.
Stinger: "Help me!"

Favorite Riff:
Joel: "You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples!"

Best segment: The Charlie McCarthey bit I liked.
Worst segment: Segment 2 spirals downhill from the getgo.

Comments:
-Servo has been given a haircut, and now has a thinner "bubble."

-In segment 3, when Mike appears in the Hexfield, he's wearing Joel's old KTMA suit! Thanks to MST Temple for pointing this out!

-The first "Stinger" ever, is of a blind man exclaiming "Help me."

Overall/Rating: An average episode, with no real highlights, but is far from being bad. I'd give it **1/2.

[brandonakaxerxes]

Man, it's been over a year since I started these reviews, and I've barely gotten season 2 done. I'm a dickweed aren't I? Here's 206.

206- The Ring of Terror, w/ short: The Phantom Creeps.

Movie Plot: As part of a college hazing a man his sent to a tomb to steal a mummy's ring.

Host Segments:
Opening: Crow & Servo trick Joel into thinking it's movie sign
Invention Exchange: The Dr has Frank locked in a giant version of the "Operation Game". Joel plays pinball with his innards
Segment 1: It's the Old School for old students
Segment 2: Joel performs an autopsy on a vacuum
Segment 3: The Bots can't think of a good thing to say about the movie
Closing: Franks sings the wonderful, "If Chauffeurs Ruled the World"
Stinger: Old student sez... "Weird, yeah I guess you could call it that. Weird."

Fav. Riff from Movie:
"Lewis B Moffitt..."
Crow: "Sat on a Tuffit."

Fav. Riff from Short:
Crow: "Well, let's hope the rear projection holds out."

Best Segment: "If Chauffers ruled the world, then everyone would take a backseat to me!" "Push the button, Judy Garland!"
Worst Segment: The Good Thing/ Bad Thing throwback is a miss for me

Overall: A lot of MSTies rave about this episode, but this isn't one of my favorites. The movie and short are boring and tedious. The riffing is very sparse in my opinion. Not a good starter episode for a newcomer. Pass.

Rating: **