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Post by Detective Mitchell on May 31, 2004 15:36:20 GMT -5
Newspaper Reporter wear from KMart. For the sophisticated world of local news reporting. Not on tv? You don't have to match! Stripes and plaids do go together in our world! Time Chaser brand 10-speeds! Be the first geek on your block to have the "Official" Time Chasers bike, dubbed, 'Nick'! And finally, Castleton t-shirts. Yeah, I know. I've got nothing this time. I love the idea for Castleton T-Shirts. I would buy one right now (Yes Virginia, I am a geek). The 10-speeds sound cool also.
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Post by Bart Fargo on Jun 2, 2004 4:23:19 GMT -5
Ah, the more we do this, the more I realize just how wonderful an imagination my fellow MiSTies have. <evil grin>
Winners this time around are: Best - detective Mitchell's Nick Miller Dart Game. I can't wait to throw darts at his face. You win the commodore C64 PC used in the film. Worst - Ator's Nick Miller Chin. You win the two types of plaid outfit. Weirdest - Rob T. Firefly's 1985 non-driver mobile. Sounds more dangerous than a Ford Pinto. You win a sycophant-gram from the sycophant guy in the film.
What I would have done: A do-it-yourself revolutionary war reinactment kit. Comes complete with everything you need to poorly reinact a battle in the American Revolution.
This week's experiment to merchandise: The Beginning of the End!
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Post by Jack Burton on Jun 2, 2004 7:26:57 GMT -5
Locust Mating Call CD. All your favorite locust mating calls together on one disc! Now you and your friends can drive giant locusts out to sea just like the settlers at Jamestown. Send $19.95 to:
Locust Mating Call CD 35 Peter Graves Blvd. Chicago IL C/0 B.I.G. Industries
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Post by Rob T Firefly on Jun 2, 2004 17:04:11 GMT -5
A postcard featuring a photo of bugs crawling on that building which was really a postcard.
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Post by Detective Mitchell on Jun 3, 2004 11:49:12 GMT -5
The Bert I. Gordon Script-O-Matic: Changes any script (comedy, drama, sci-fi), no matter how serious or true-to-life it is, around to include giant creatures or ghosts, just like what the notorious B.I.G. would have done! Just insert the script in the mail slot on the front, program it for the genre the script is, and presto! In just a few minutes, you will hav a B.I.G-ized script ready to sell to Hollywood! Imagine: GIGLI, FROM JUSTIN TO KELLY, and LORD OF THE RINGS all with giant grasshoppers!
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Post by Miss Interoceter on Jun 5, 2004 16:17:41 GMT -5
The Albert Glasser Beginning of the End soundtrack on LP! BAH bah - bum bum bum bum bum BAH bah ...
VersaGate. Close any road off to thru traffic with the VersaGate! Paint your own road closed sign, attach it to one of your dad's sawhorses and you too can be a member of the Illinois National Guard! Write for details.
Disappearing Brownie Camera. Make your camera bilocate! Sure for years we've all dreamed of having such an ability from our camera. Make it happen now. Got stopped by the Illinois National Guard and told to return to your car? Get into your car with your camera and lay it on the seat beside you? Don't have a viable reason to go back to that spot again? No problem! Simply hit the bilocate button and Whammo! your camera disappears and winds up in Corporal Matthias' secure grip. Now, you can go back, claim your camera and get a scoop on the other news services! And all this time you thought it was just a continuity error!
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Post by Bart Fargo on Jun 11, 2004 10:44:07 GMT -5
Ah, more winners here! Best: Interociter's disappearing Brownie camera. You win a giant tomato from the film (may smell a bit.) Worst: Detective Mitchell's Bert I. Gordon script-o-matic: I didn't think there was any way to make Gigli worse, but you proved me wrong. You win the postcard - erm, the building that the crickets climbed on. Weirdest: Laserblasts Locust mating call CD. I'm not sure if I'd want to play this on my CD player... You win the reporter's car from the film. What I would have done: Make your own giant crops! Genetically enhanced crops that make tomatoes the size of a VW bug! Next film to merchandise: Quest of the Delta Knights!
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Post by Detective Mitchell on Jun 21, 2004 14:39:46 GMT -5
Throw Your Own Renaissance Festival Kit: The definitive kit to turn your house or neighborhood into a renaissance festival and/or filming location, for films like QUEST.
Actually, my Script-O-Matic would have made GIGLI better. Wouldn't you like to see Ben Affleck and J-Lo eaten by giant grasshoppers too?
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Post by Railingkill on Jun 23, 2004 9:38:28 GMT -5
david warner action figure with two different outfits (wizard guy and crow man) comes with a pot (pee sold seperatly) and has a button on the back that causes him to throw pee on unsuspecting slave owners
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Post by Bart Fargo on Jun 27, 2004 4:47:51 GMT -5
Actually, my Script-O-Matic would have made GIGLI better. Wouldn't you like to see Ben Affleck and J-Lo eaten by giant grasshoppers too? Well... not really. "I could never hurt this movie as much as it hurt me." - Crow. Keep working on this one! We need one more before the next film!
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Post by Miss Interoceter on Jul 7, 2004 5:55:33 GMT -5
Delta Knights and Tree People. A new game by Milton Bradley!
okay, it's really just Dungeons and Dragons with the characters changed to the people in this film. Jr. High kids and college freshmen will love it though.
Man. Remember when board games were cool?
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Post by Bart Fargo on Jul 9, 2004 3:42:48 GMT -5
Ah, more winners here!
Best: throw your own Renfest kit by Detective Mitchell. You win the spigot on Tee's head.
Worst: The Delta Knights and Tree people game by Interociter. There are too many of thos D&D clones out there already. You win the pee pot.
Weirdest: By default, The David Warner Action figures by Railingkill. Not really that weird, but there aren't any others around and this one's been up for a while...
What I would have done: Your own Archimedies storehouse. Impress your friends with a bunch of junk created by one of the most brilliant minds of all time! Comes complete with a laser thingy that shoots beams of light that kill.
Next Movie to merchandise: Overdrawn at the Memory Bank!
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Post by Detective Mitchell on Jul 9, 2004 7:40:21 GMT -5
Doppling Kit: a special kit that allows you to build a doppling room (contractor not included), and all of the technology necessary to dopple someone. Dopple your enemy (or IRS auditor) into the body of a snail! Dopple yourself into a bald eagle for a wounderful vacation! It's the offical OVERDRWAN AT THE MEMORY BANK doppling kit, by Ronco!
Or, they can make computer terminals like Fingal's in the film. Use it as decoration and watch films on it.
Or the alternate Ten Commandments they used in the "Appolonia-as-Venus" scene... in pocket size!
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Post by Gemini Man on Jul 9, 2004 7:54:16 GMT -5
A copy of Fat Man's new excercise video titled "Sweatin' to...everything!"
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Post by Railingkill on Jul 9, 2004 18:15:22 GMT -5
The Raulbix cube (can't think of anything better)
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