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Post by Reuisu on Oct 10, 2004 0:56:07 GMT -5
Robot Monster
Reel Life: A child dreams that earth has been destroyed by a monkey with a diving helmet on, and said monkey decides to live in a cave, argue with another monkey, and falls in love with a girl.
Real Life: A child has an odd dream like that and is sentenced to ritallin (sp?) and other psychological drugs and treatments in order to cure him of his problems. Supposing that said monkey did actually, in fact, try to take over the world, Sophie Aldred walks up to it with a baseball bat and bashes its stupid diving helmet head in and walks away with a smile on her face.
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Post by Bart Fargo on Oct 20, 2004 9:35:31 GMT -5
From #104 - Women of the Prehistoric Planet:
In Reel life...
The captain of a space-faring vessel treats the women on his crew like toys for his amusement. The women merely grit their teeth and bear it.
In Real life...
The captain of a vessel treats the women on his crew like toys for his amusement. They get mad and complain to his superior officers and the media of sexual harassment. Captain is either promoted to admiral or dishonorably discharged from service. Women then go on talk show circuit to discuss what happened to them.
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Post by Slick's ghost on Nov 13, 2004 4:38:29 GMT -5
Reel life: Man gets caught in an atomic blast and afterwards becomes really huge and crabby.
Real life: Man dies in atomic blast.
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Post by Reuisu on Nov 13, 2004 15:03:36 GMT -5
Gamera
Reel Life: A giant turtle wakes up from its arctic sleep, destroys cities, and is helped by an evil little child named Kenny.
Real Life: Kenny is shot to death by law enforcement officers because he's attempting to interfere with people saving the world and Gamera is subsequently stopped by conventional weapons. Why? Because even if he's a giant turtle that can breathe flames and fly, HE'S STILL A FRIGGIN' TURTLE.
*Walks away whistling the Gamera theme song*
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Post by Slick's ghost on Nov 14, 2004 5:49:42 GMT -5
Reel life: Southern college students and a professor hunt for bigfoot in a swamp.
Real life: College? In the south?
I kid, of course.
Heh. You know, I've been to five colleges all told. I'm almost a sophomore....yeah.
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Post by Mr. Atari on Nov 16, 2004 17:37:23 GMT -5
Reel Life: Husband takes wife into caves on their honeymoon, is bitten by a bat, and becomes an ape-like/bat-like creature who drinks blood.
Real Life: Husband and wife have a lot of sex on their honeymoon.
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Post by Bart Fargo on Nov 28, 2004 14:39:09 GMT -5
From #407- Junior Rodeo Daredevils:
Reel Life: Two kids tie a tin can to a horse's tail. They are then caught and asked to start a junior rodeo.
Real life: Two kids tie a tin can to a horse's tail. They are caught, scolded, and most likely paddled for this.
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Post by Dave Walker on Nov 30, 2004 19:14:47 GMT -5
The Screaming Skull:
Reel Life: You kill your first wife and inherit all her property with no police involvement or suspicion falling upon you. Then, you remarry another rich girl and nearly kill her too, still no police and almost no suspicion.
Real Life: The Reverend Mr. Snow actually calls the cops the first time - while no hard evidence, they suspect you of the first one anyway. The skull is rendered irrelevant, end of story.
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Post by mrsphyllistorgo on Dec 7, 2004 21:46:52 GMT -5
Reel Life-- A group of children is contacted by a blob from outer space. With little or no opposition, they join children all over the world in destroying all nulcear weapons everywhere, and everybody holds hands.
Real Life--The kids are captured by the military guards, and they and their families are "removed" from the site and mercilessly interrogated. The blob is found and reduced to its component elements by science and the world's Thunderers launched on schedule, forming a useless and expensive ring around the earth with rapidly outdated and decaying technology. The fellow space blobs are disgusted by the human race and sell popcorn to all other intergalactic species gathering to watch the eventual nuclear firework display.
mrsphyllistorgo
Hank'll kill everybody if you let him.
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Post by Slick's ghost on Dec 11, 2004 6:04:52 GMT -5
Reel life - Coleman Francis escapes from prison, runs away from hound dogs, hides in bushes, and eludes capture for months.
Real life - Coleman Francis leaves a trail of stench a goldfish could follow and he is picked up that same evening.
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Kimi
Tibby
Ensign Expendable
Posts: 69
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Post by Kimi on Jul 24, 2005 22:24:04 GMT -5
From K16- City on Fire: Reel Life: a bunch of kids smoke and cause a small fire that the fire dept puts out. Kids are mildly scolded for their actions. Real life: Kids smoke and cause a small fire. Kids are grounded until age 18, forced to work to pay for some of the damages they caused, and in some cases, receive a paddling for it. From #407- Junior Rodeo Daredevils: Reel Life: Two kids tie a tin can to a horse's tail. They are then caught and asked to start a junior rodeo. Real life: Two kids tie a tin can to a horse's tail. They are caught, scolded, and most likely paddled for this. In today's world of self-esteem, empowerment and redirection of junior's energies, I think the reverse could be true on each of these!  |
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Krankor
Anteater
Kiss off Slappy
Posts: 13
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Post by Krankor on Jul 25, 2005 0:43:26 GMT -5
Touch of Satan
In reel life: Kid "isn't sure" if he wants to go to school to be a lawyer like his dad. Dad is super nice and gives kid muscle car and 500 dollars to "find what he's all about."
In real life: Kid "isn't sure" if he wants to go to school to be a lawyer like his dad. Dad tells kid he'd better get his ass in school, and makes him work part time at a gas station to make money to live off in college.
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Post by TV's Cowboy on Jul 25, 2005 7:57:16 GMT -5
Time of the Apes
Reel Life
Our heroes seek help from Godo a kind man who lives in a cave
Real Life
Guy in cave is actually a deranged psycho killer that escaped from the mental institution
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Post by Don Quixote on Jul 25, 2005 10:17:51 GMT -5
Terror from the Year 5000
Reel Life: On an island in Florida, a beautiful woman flirts with you while increasingly ignoring her fiance. You easily trounce him while making yourself increasingly attractive to said woman
Real Life: The moment a woman gets wind that you may be attracted to her, she introduces you to her boyfriend, and you're forced to slither back into your little lonely world. Even if you managed to beat him down, the woman finds you repulsive. The fiance visits you while you're sleeping and starts beating on you, driving your nose bone up into your brain, causing instant death.
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Post by Bart Fargo on Jul 25, 2005 10:21:15 GMT -5
Master Ninja II
Reel life: Girl wants to organize a union. Ninja master and partner come in and help fight mean, corrupt bosses. Workers are allowed to form union.
Real life: Girl wants to organize a union. Is fired on the spot. Can't get hired again because she's a "troublemaker."
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